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  1. #1
    Expansive... Other Mummy's Avatar
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    The Lingering Parent....getting annoyed

    This has been discussed in a previous post about parents hanging around to "talk"...but I still have an issue with this one DCD that picks up his son and just HANGS out on my property. Be it in the driveway (or even parked on the street). This is the family that will stay 30 min + to hang out in the backyard at pickup (if we are in the yard at pickup). This is why I avoid going to the yard when it is pick up time for this particular DCB. We go after they leave

    However, this DCD will stay up to 15 min in my driveway just chatting with his son, or hanging out in their car IN MY DRIVEWAY Often blocking the sidewalk. I have a clear written policy that I just updated and gave to parents 3 weeks ago. This is in my policy. No lingering, please pick up child promptly as we don't want congestion around the house. Makes it easier for everyone (neighbours, etc).

    So....how do I go about telling this DCD to pick up son, get in car and GO HOME! Tactfully of course. I'm at a loss. This bugs me big time. We live in a bungelow and often see him walking around my front yard with his son. Freaks me out when I turn around and see them just "hanging" out. Very weird. This is not a "commercial" daycare but a private residence. Why on earth do you want to hang out on my property??

    Today if this happens again, I'm going to take the rest of my DCK's out for a wagon ride on the front sidewalk and ask him point blank if there is anything else he needs? Did you forget something? are you waiting for someone??

  2. #2
    Euphoric ! Dreamalittledream's Avatar
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    How rare is this; parents who don't have to rush off to this activity or another...a parent taking the time to just spend time with his child. I think that's awesome! But, I don't think it would be a bad thing to gently remind him that other parents do need the driveway space for pickups, or, as you mentioned, a subtle confrontation
    Children are great imitators.
    So give them something great to imitate.

    ~Anonymous~

  3. #3
    Euphoric !
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    I'm sure there is a park on his way home he could stop at and have some quality time with his child instead of in your front yard.

  4. #4
    Expansive... Other Mummy's Avatar
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    Yes there is a park literally 3 houses down from me. I just need some suggestions to get this parent to leave and not hang out here. I'm actually creeped out AND annoyed. What would you say to daycare dad ?

  5. #5
    Euphoric ! kidlove's Avatar
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    Are you single? Don't answer, just wondering if he is hanging out for OTHER reasons. or maybe he is one of those "showy" Dad's...like he wants you and everyone else in the world to see whats a great Dad he is! I don't blame you for being "creaped out" I would too, I have a Mom who lingers and thats bad enough, def wouldnt be comfortable with a Dad that lingers, My hubby wouldn't either. If you had to go somewhere, would he stay in your yard, with you not home? Maybe you can just pretend you are leaving so he goes, then drive around the block and back home......ha ha

  6. #6
    Expansive... Other Mummy's Avatar
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    LOL... I'm definitely NOT single. He's met my hubby many times. Funny though when he comes with wife they leave right away if they are picking up at door. It's only when he's by himself. Really don't think it's that at all. Just need some fresh ideas as what to tell him to go home please and don't linger. Maybe I should just grow a stronger backbone and tell him exactly this.

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  8. #7
    Euphoric ! kidlove's Avatar
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    its never easy to "confront" face to face, thats probly why I let things go for longer than I'd like.....however, the ONE thing I DO is, type up a universal letter to all, and pass it out at the end of the day, just state clearly "drop offs and pick ups need to be as quick as possible" maybe you can add that some kids may be having a tough transition in the am drops (just as a cover) and that neighbors have had concerns over "lingering" parents. blame it on the "unknown" person, that way....this Dad has no one to get frustrated with, in general. ha ha not sure what else.

  9. #8
    Euphoric ! mimi's Avatar
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    I would tell him the parking authorities regularly monitor your neighborhood and parking across a sidewalk equals a ticket. I would also say, as was previously suggested, that for the benefit of your neighbors, you are trying to keep pick up congestion to a minimum. You will appear like you are looking out for his best interest and your neighbors. Aren't you a nice person!

  10. #9
    Expansive... Play and Learn's Avatar
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    I just say to parents who try to linger not to. Or have said to some dance parents (as I have a dance school in my basement) that for insurance purposes, that they leave the property as soon as I release them from class. They get the hint quickly enough!

  11. #10
    Euphoric !
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    Blaming it on insurance is a good excuse saying once you have picked up your child I can not be responsible for you still being in my yard. Please use the park down the street - and don't forget to take your car with you (wouldn't want them to just walk,lol).

    Use the excuse that you need the parking spot for another parent and he needs to vacate it as quickly as he can.

    I have had a parent come and hang out when we are out back playing at end of day saying other spouse was making supper and they are putting in time so it will be ready as soon as they get home so they don't have to deal with the child whining for food - considering child is busy playing and not whining when they are telling me this - well hard to have sympathy knowing it is just a learned game.

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