Sorry this happened.....the only thing I can think of is she is inexperienced and didn't bargain for such a "rough" go of things. It is difficult to start a new child who won't eat or maybe cries all day. But,.....knowing children as I do, you need to give them time to adjust, especially children who have never been in Day Care before. Sounds like all the way around everyone is in a stinky situation. If I were to guess the situation: She decided to start a Day Care from home to be with her own daughter....HAD families lined up and for whatever reason all decided to go with someone else but you. Her initial intention was to NOT charge for deposit (making it easier on the families) but after the canceling of all the other families...she really needed money to get bills paid and due to your offer of paying ahead (perhaps talked it over with her Husband) and realized that extra cash may be a good start to get caught up on the bills that may have been lingering since taking on this new endeavor. (something she didn't anticipate)
This is the "gamble" a parent takes when going with a NEW provider, I always put myself in the parents shoes and completely agree with the idea of "going with a more seasoned provider". Choosing a provider you have to take a lot of things into consideration and "experience" is a BIG factor. even if the provider is a mother to many and has been for years, the job itself is new to her, the paperwork, the ups and downs, the difficult child, the transition for all...these are all things that can make or break someone who has never tried it before. Thank you for being willing to go with her anyway, that says a lot for all providers, you seem like a really nice person and all new providers dream of a parent like you. Not saying its not a good choice to go with some one new, just saying you took a gamble and unfortunately...didn 't come out on top. I don't think anyone is to blame here, just keep looking and learn from this situation. Maybe it would be a better idea to go for someone who's been in the business a little longer. Only because you are new at this too, going with someone inexperienced is kind of like "the blind leading the blind". As far as losing your deposit? well...have you found another provider yet? if not....and your child is in "quality" care with this provider....just stick it out, sympathize with her...keep and open communication for the next few weeks and get your moneys worth in daycare. if you are not comfortable with keeping your child in care, I guess you will lose the money, considering she has offered her services through the required time on the contract and you will have to forgo your deposit. Good Luck finding your next provider, and for your childs sake....I hope this one will "stick"