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Thread: Need help!

  1. #1
    Starting to feel at home...
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    Wink Need help!

    I need your guys help! Here is the problem My son is five yrs old. This yr i have been dealing with him not opening up to me. He started grade 1 this yr i had trouble getting him on the bus for the first two weeks. I have asked him why wont he go to school he says i dont know, im tired. At first i thought is it a bully. I had asked him if someone was being mean to him. He gave me a blank face. But went to grandmas that night and said someone pushed me. So i called the school talked with princapal and teacher. After i told him to ignore it and tell a teacher if it happens again. He went to school that next week no problems.

    Issue number two - so tonight he had a birthday party to go to and five mins before we leave he is freaking out that he doesnt want to go. He was fine all day and excited to go until i said to his sister that.
    we are going to drop him off then come home and eat dinner.

    Issue number 3- i signed him up for swimming lessons the first day he kicked and screamed that he didnt want to go. Didnt want to get dressed. So grandma manged to get him dressed and he got into the pool until he had to go pee. He goes to the washroom and grandma comes out with him saying he says his tired and his tummy is upset. I had to get a refund. He didnt want to go back.

    Im not sure why all of a sudden hes doing this? Hes never had separtion issues before even being little and all of a sudden now?

  2. #2
    Euphoric ! kidlove's Avatar
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    Oh my, Sweetness....sounds VERY much like my little boy!!! He went through a "phaze" of "not wanting to go anywhere or try anything NEW" for about a year or so. Would hide behind our garage from the school bus, would complain of "feeling sick" when we were going out to eat...would cry a refuse to join when we brought him to t-ball practice!! Sounds just like him....there is end in sight! the first thing you HAVE TO DO is....continue to encourage him to be indipendant and be very positive regarding him getting out on his own or trying "new" things, DON'T give in, if you let him believe there is a reason to be afraid or feel "anxiety" , it will only make things worse. (that is what we concluded it was with our son...anxiety..self induced)
    It really is just a phaze, and the best thing you can do is NOT dwell on his complaints, and KEEp him active...not too active though (you dont want to push him into a room of strangers unless nec, and make him feel "safe") rub his back and tell him it's okay, you will see him in a bit!

    My son is now in the 3rd grade and less scared than his sister who is in 6th, the forst day of school ( in a new school) I asked if he wanted me to stay until the final bell rang? He said no, I'm fine Mom!!!

    dont make a big deal of it! and let him grow and learn on his own....he'll be fine!!

  3. #3
    Euphoric ! kidlove's Avatar
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    probly having the "what if's" what if no one likes me, what if I fall on my face, what if my tummy starts to hurt, what if I get scared......he is letting his fears of the unknown get the best of him and causing the anxiety.

  4. #4
    Euphoric !
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    Yes, my oldest son used to complain of sotmaches every single morning for the first three years of school! It was so bad that hsi kindergarten teacher and I developed a system of sending him to the sick room to rest a bit and if he actually threw up they would call me to get him. He found school hard and had a lot of anxiety around going.

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