One of my favorite quotes from a nutrition workshop I attended goes like this ....

Our job as the adult is to serve a variety of healthy food options are regular/consistent intervals throughout the day (ideally every 3-4 hours) and our other job is to set expectations for acceptable behavior at the table (aka we sit and keep others company, we do not chew with mouthful, we do not ask for more food when we have food already on our plate, etc whatever 'behavior' you value around mealtime.) ~ a child's job is to decide if and how much they are going to eat at those intervals within your rules ... you cannot force a child to eat and trying to will create food battles and manipulative issues where children use food as a weapon against your guilt/fear to only eat what they 'like' so to speak!

I do not cater to picky eaters and I do not allow them any control or 'worry' if they are not eating ~ children in North America are picky because we LET them be picky by allowing them to fill up on CRAP verses teaching them to be appreciative that they have regular access to healthy food options in the first place ~ you eat what you are served and be grateful or you do not eat at all this meal time and learn what it feels like to get a little 'hungry'.

Here if you do not eat your 'healthy options' first you do not get served 'treats' ...IMO that is what makes it a 'treat' cause it is something you only get once in a while to supplement a healthy diet of foods you NEED in order to thrive

When I serve a meal I serve a small bit of ALL the food groups at the same time including fruit ~ if they only eat the fruit so be it that is there choice if they only eat the 'pasta' portion so be it. However I do not serve 'seconds' of what I feel are the 'less healthy options' aka HIGH GLYCEMIC CARBS unless you've cleaned your plate .... so small portion of pasta, potato, rice, bread with first serving of meat / veggie / fruit ... you can eat as much fruit / veggie / meat as desired but you only get one Canada's Food Guide portion of 'grains/carbs' until your plate is CLEAN of the healthy options and than you can have a second serving of your 'preferred' tastes. To be honest I do not serve a lot of pasta / potato / rice anyway unless they are in a 'stew/casserole' and well than you need to eat the stuff 'attached' to them to get more

I only do 'treats' here on special occasions and they are served at the pm snack AFTER the healthy option has been eaten ~ so a child who is picky would not be getting the 'treat' unless they'd eaten the first portion of snack ... that is not ME depriving them of the food that is them CHOOSING not to follow the rules or expectations around meal time I have because they are obviously not HUNGRY enough to eat

Also since I make my own 'treats' anyway even my 'chocolate fudgy birthday cupcakes' on birthdays are healthy cause I make them with Avocado and Zucchini and use coconut flour so they are high in protein and contain a serving of 'veggie' and have no refined sugar in them ... just a little bit of dark cocoa to make them chocolatey and applesauce to sweeten ... so a picky eater may think they are getting away with murder cause I let them have seconds but the jokes on them

I hide a lot of 'fruits/veggies' inside baked goods here .... morning muffins, afternoon cupcakes, pureed into sauces served over meat or veggies at lunch time ... picky eaters do not stand a chance here.