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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dreamalittledream View Post
    That whole email was fantastic advice. May I borrow your advice to create a checklist for parents of my websites coming in?
    Sure feel free
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  2. #22
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    Well tell them "if you are not going to return my deposit I'm afraid I will take this mater to small claim court and make sure the T.V. Is evolved too." I have seen couple of posts here looking for bad dayhomes, day cares so there you go. It is ridiculous for them to offer to pay you back in the new year. And what is " bring him next year when he is better" there is nothing wrong with your child for him to be " better" he is just scared to be with strangers in a strange place which is very normal! Beside, where did they get the idea that you will send your child back to them? I would NEVER! send my child to them again. And the way they are talking to you is rude too!

    Take them to small claim court and honestly, contact those T.V people and let them do the work!

  3. #23
    Thanks all for ur replies..We are not interested at this point to spend extra amount again to go to the small claims court,are there any free services available???This one is private home daycare.How do I contact city representative??
    Last edited by test; 11-07-2012 at 12:04 PM.

  4. #24
    Euphoric ! Inspired by Reggio's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by test View Post
    Thanks all for ur replies..We are not interested at this point to spend extra amount again to go to the small claims court,are there any free services available???This one is private home daycare.How do I contact city representative??
    If you are not wanting to go to small claims court than I would at the very least make a report of the businesses poor practices and treatment of clients and failure to return money for services being 'withheld' to the Better Business Bureau ... my understanding is that is FREE and they do not have to be a 'member' to have a file complaint opened on them ... they will 'mediate' the claim between you and the business and if they refuse to come to a compromise or solution the complaint you file gets put PUBLIC on their site and the business will get an F rating for any other client seeking business can 'search' that business and see their BBB rating AND that a unresolved complaint is on record for at least 12 months I believe.

    If more clients using private home childcare who had valid complaints about financial practices or safety of service made use of this venue than perhaps those with shoddy unprofessional practice would be made more accountable because there would be a mediated unbiased 'record' of their complaints made against them! As a consumer I ALWAYS check the BBB before hiring anyone as well as other references and so forth to make an informed decision ~ it is a great resource when properly utilized.

    http://www.bbb.org/canada/

    Either way I would send a registered letter to the business STATING what your plan of action is if you do not have your security deposit refunded to you by X date you will be first filing with the BBB and if that does not resolve the issue THAN you may have no option to take it to Small Claims court (it does not mean you HAVE to do that but if you do file with the BBB than it might open their eyes that you truly mean business and they will get smart and settle cause no judge is going to rule in their favor based on what you've shared).

    If you want to report it to the Ministry of Education you can ~ but they do no really do much about private home childcare's unless the person is 'over ratio' and operating illegally as a result.... here is the link to how to resolve problems with a childcare program at least for Ontario.
    http://www.edu.gov.on.ca/childcare/concerns.html
    Children construct their own intelligence. The adult must provide activities and context, but most of all must be able to listen. Children need proof that adults believe in them. Their three great desires are to be listened to, to understand, and to demonstrate that they are exactly what we expect."
    Loris Malaguzzi

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  6. #25
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    As a provider i ask the parents (if possible) to please slowly adjust the child to my house. I suggest a few days a week for half days and see how they do with that and then add in full days and go from there

  7. #26
    Starting to feel at home... angelina's Avatar
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    Sorry, the arrangement did not work. Some kids will take more than the others to adjust.

    I saw some daycare centers who stated that day 1 - parents stay with baby in the baby area for about the day, just to be familiar// then day 2. - parent stay for 4 hours:// then day 3 parents stay for 2 hours// then by day 5 hopefully just 30 minute parent child time - then kid will be okay. and they recognize that some children takes longer or shorter but that was the ideal recommendation they said that have work for them. Let us say not all parents can do that, but at least the centers experience has success rates for baby transition.

    Actually, I have a case to share - I hope I am not jumping in your topic, but sort of reverse is happening to me. I am a private daycare, so I do all my contracts. I write it as simple as it can be. No deposit, stated the termed contract "nov 19, 2012 to dec 14, 2012". mom said she is off school by dec 14th, so we end it there, and she said we will do another one for january 2013 till end of school year depending on her schedule as a student nurse. Baby is 9 months, adorable, easy going...loving. cry is not an issue, i took him to playgroup - he enjoys it, i took him to park, loves it.
    Now today, day 3 - the mom called me if the baby was here at 11:20am. i said "yeah, your husband drop him off". she said, "oh my husband beat me up, i'm in the police, don't give the baby to my husband, i will pick up my baby" . i said "sure". Come 2:30 pm, dad knocks the door and said he is off early to pick up baby. I said sure, come in, dress him up as I am busy. He came in, he dress baby, i told him his feeding and diapers and next snack and he was fine with that. And when he left, I texted the mom that dad pick him up early. She freaked out on me, saying " I told you not to give him to him:". I told her "what right do i have to keep the baby in daycare away from his dad?"

    I was so upset and I was just shaking my head. What I think? The 9 month baby is more mature than the parents. It is never my job to babysit these adults, only baby.

    I really like the child, he is adorable. The mother said she is entitled to alter the contract. I told her "no, you don't". It is my daycare, my business. Only a court order can change, who gets the baby. As it stand, both parents are entitled EQUALLY to pick up baby. I told her that she has 3 options: 1. keep the contract as it, until they settle their fights, 2. get a court order, or restraining order, saying husband cannot come to my home at _____ meters away, 3. she keeps her baby home until they both come to a settlement.

    If she bothers me again about change in contract without court documents, she can keep her baby home until she finalize custody agreements.
    My job is to take care of baby, from 7:15 am to 4pm, per contract.

    Tell me, is there anything else I can say to them ( except telling them to grow up and this baby is human being, not a toy to fight over) ?

    Do you think I have ground to cancel the contract because it is only 3 days, and I don't want any trouble. note: the parents are old (in their 30's)
    If they whine, give them cheese. If they're not hugable, hug yourself. (me)

  8. #27
    Euphoric ! Inspired by Reggio's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by angelina View Post
    ...
    If she bothers me again about change in contract without court documents, she can keep her baby home until she finalize custody agreements. My job is to take care of baby, from 7:15 am to 4pm, per contract. .
    I would have handled this exactly the same way you have ... please do not bring your drama into my program and it is up to the courts to decide if your child's father no longer has rights to his child not yours or mine!

    I actually have a written policy on how custody arrangements or changes to them for 'separated / divorced' clients are handled here!

    Custody Arrangements
    If you are in a situation where both parents are not living under the same roof please ensure that you put in writing how you would like to handle making decisions regarding your child’s best interests while in care. For example how you want to handle payment of fees, the sharing of information about your child, who receives the distribution of written information, and who can authorize the release of your child at departure time.

    It is my recommendation that all separated/divorced parents provide a copy of the custody arrangement. I would be UNABLE TO ENFORCE any custodial parents requests WITHOUT legal documentation.

    This copy should include the following.
     TITLE PAGE (this states who is involved),
     CUSTODY PORTION (this clarifies the agreed upon arrangements), and
     THE JUDGES SEAL & SIGNATURE (this confirms it has been reviewed by a court of law).

    Parents need to work together to ensure that collectively that there is consistently one set of directions and they are presenting a united front as far as decisions or issues that affect your little ones participation in the program.

    It is the responsibility of both parents to keep the lines of communication open. Unfortunately it is not my role, nor do I have proper counseling background, to mediate family disagreements. Should a family be in a situation where their inability to provide a united front while in the program, and in my opinion, this behaviour is affecting the well being of their own child or others within the program I may be required to discontinue services until such a time that ‘family harmony’ can be restored. Please see the ‘Code of Conduct’ section for details.
    Children construct their own intelligence. The adult must provide activities and context, but most of all must be able to listen. Children need proof that adults believe in them. Their three great desires are to be listened to, to understand, and to demonstrate that they are exactly what we expect."
    Loris Malaguzzi

  9. #28
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    Wow! What a mess! I feel for you I htink you did the right thing...you could not say no to the dad based on what the mom said. You contract has both parents as able to pick up the child...you have no legal right to deny the dad his child. I guess the only thing that you might have done differently is not to say "sure" when the mom called requesting such a thing...it set her up to believe that you were going to follow her request. But, sometimes in the moment it is hard to think clearly too! I think if there is any more trouble, i would terminate as I would not want to be in the middle of such a messy situation, but maybe it will calm down and they will not involve you again now that you have laid out their options. Good luck!
    By the way...I did have a good chuckle out of you saying that they are "old...in their 30's" Aren't most parents these days having babies in their 30's? Anyway, not to detract from the seriousness of your post...I just found this part funny




    Quote Originally Posted by angelina View Post
    Sorry, the arrangement did not work. Some kids will take more than the others to adjust.

    I saw some daycare centers who stated that day 1 - parents stay with baby in the baby area for about the day, just to be familiar// then day 2. - parent stay for 4 hours:// then day 3 parents stay for 2 hours// then by day 5 hopefully just 30 minute parent child time - then kid will be okay. and they recognize that some children takes longer or shorter but that was the ideal recommendation they said that have work for them. Let us say not all parents can do that, but at least the centers experience has success rates for baby transition.

    Actually, I have a case to share - I hope I am not jumping in your topic, but sort of reverse is happening to me. I am a private daycare, so I do all my contracts. I write it as simple as it can be. No deposit, stated the termed contract "nov 19, 2012 to dec 14, 2012". mom said she is off school by dec 14th, so we end it there, and she said we will do another one for january 2013 till end of school year depending on her schedule as a student nurse. Baby is 9 months, adorable, easy going...loving. cry is not an issue, i took him to playgroup - he enjoys it, i took him to park, loves it.
    Now today, day 3 - the mom called me if the baby was here at 11:20am. i said "yeah, your husband drop him off". she said, "oh my husband beat me up, i'm in the police, don't give the baby to my husband, i will pick up my baby" . i said "sure". Come 2:30 pm, dad knocks the door and said he is off early to pick up baby. I said sure, come in, dress him up as I am busy. He came in, he dress baby, i told him his feeding and diapers and next snack and he was fine with that. And when he left, I texted the mom that dad pick him up early. She freaked out on me, saying " I told you not to give him to him:". I told her "what right do i have to keep the baby in daycare away from his dad?"

    I was so upset and I was just shaking my head. What I think? The 9 month baby is more mature than the parents. It is never my job to babysit these adults, only baby.

    I really like the child, he is adorable. The mother said she is entitled to alter the contract. I told her "no, you don't". It is my daycare, my business. Only a court order can change, who gets the baby. As it stand, both parents are entitled EQUALLY to pick up baby. I told her that she has 3 options: 1. keep the contract as it, until they settle their fights, 2. get a court order, or restraining order, saying husband cannot come to my home at _____ meters away, 3. she keeps her baby home until they both come to a settlement.

    If she bothers me again about change in contract without court documents, she can keep her baby home until she finalize custody agreements.
    My job is to take care of baby, from 7:15 am to 4pm, per contract.

    Tell me, is there anything else I can say to them ( except telling them to grow up and this baby is human being, not a toy to fight over) ?

    Do you think I have ground to cancel the contract because it is only 3 days, and I don't want any trouble. note: the parents are old (in their 30's)

  10. #29
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    I have not read all the replies, I must apologize. However, this is absurd that your daycare provider would terminate after only the first week!!! It takes longer than that for an infant to adjust to daycare. In most cases, although I am not perfect and don't know it all and am only human, it takes about 4 weeks for an infant to become comfortable with their new daycare provider.

    Maybe she (daycare provider) just couldn't handle the crying and I guess knows her limits, hopefully she will not take infants in the future. You should get your deposit back.....if it were me I would refund the deposit.....however if it were me I would have given at least 4 weeks for your child to adjust and then talk about my concerns before making such a rash decision.

    Good luck. You will find a great provider, there are many out there. Each provider is special in their own way. You will find the right one for you.

  11. #30
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    I agree in that the caregiver didn't give it enough time, but personally as a parent, I wouldn't want this person caring for my child anyways.

    I would demand the refund back, in writing, stating that you didn't terminate care, she did. It was her choice therefor she owes you the deposit you provided.

    I would also seek out alternate care, and make sure that transitioning is part of the discussion prior to choosing a dayhome.

    Personally, for myself with young children new to childcare, I give it a 6 week transition period. I also ensure that the child has comforts from home and has attended a few times with the parent to help them feel secure. Usually for about 30minutes each time.

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