Bad start to the day :(

[mommyof2princesses]

I had the termination letter ready for pick up and I chickened out, I didn't want a confrontation seeing how she was so rude to me this morning Now I am kicking myself for not doing it and not sure what to do now

[Momof4]

Aw, don't beat yourself up. You will know when it's the last straw and you will do it.

[mimi]

Take the evening and give it a good think. We offered our suggestions, but of course you need to do what you think is best.

[Lou]

Just looking for an update!

[mommyof2princesses]

Well.....It didn't go so well but I am glad it is over now. I decided Thursday night that I couldn't wait any longer as the dcg only comes once a week so I called the dcm and explained to her that I needed to terminate and why and how I felt, etc. She became "psycho mom" at that point and just kept saying well your daughter pushed my daughter and she needs to learn to not be a bully, etc....I told her that the decision was final and she had two weeks notice as per my contract. She told me she would not be returning and picking her stuff up at 4:30pm tomorrow. I told her if I wasn't home it would be on my porch (as it was just a grocery bag of clothes and diapers). I left a copy of the termination letter in her bag as well. I didn't want a face to face confrontation with her with no witnesses around and my girls home so I left the stuff on the porch. At 4:30 the doorbell rang and it was her husband. I didn't answer and he rang it again, then picked her bag up and left. He sat in his car for 5 minutes in my driveway before leaving, not sure why. At least its over now and I can move on...hope I don't run into another parent like that anymore

Thanks to everyone who gave me advice

[mimi]

Good for you mommyof2, I am sure you are feeling great relief and are happy you stood up for yourself

[Serendipity]

Honestly from a parents perspective I would NEVER chose a child care provider who had small children of her own.

Parents can be very protective of their own child and providers with yong kids in the mix are especially vulnerable to seeing things from their child's point of view only.

NOT saying that is the case in this situation but just saying as a parent I would go out of my way to avoid this type of situation for this very reason.

In this case, the provider explains her child's actions as accidental yet the daycare parent sees it as deliberate. I wasn't there so I can't say what really happened but avoiding providers with young ones at home eliminates this kind of problem at all.

Plus, this mom may not have been trying to be rude but helpful instead or maybe just offering her opinion and the provider took it as an insult or as meaness aimed at her child so her (provider) reaction was to protect her child and stick up for her.

Just saying that when it comes to your own children, your views can often be skewed by the fact that they are yours.

[Lou]

Ah yes, us caregivers with young children are soooo negligent to the other children in our care. LOL. Did you not read her post?? It's one thing to come to your child's caregiver with your concerns, and talk in a respectful manner, but to stand their and criticize your parenting style and call your toddler a Bully is out of line no matter who you think you are. I would respond the exact same way if it had been another unrelated child in my care.

OP, I'm so glad this is over for you!! That kind of stress is definitely not needed and a weight must be lifted off your shoulders!

[mommyof2princesses]

I would have responded in the exact same manner if it were one of my daycare children, not just my child. The way the dcm acted and what she said was totally uncalled for. I am glad its over too Lou, and yes its like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Thanks everyone for your advice and support

[playfelt]

What was more than likely at play here is a mother not aware of what it means to be in family/group care. Children even when warned to be careful of the baby do not go out of their way to knock them over but sometimes they cut too close or breeze by a new walker too fast and the child loses their balance. This is normal in care and normally no one is hurt in the incident. When that mom has a second child there will be times when her older child will "accidentally" get too close to or misjudge distances and the new baby will fall. Then the mother will understand that this is just part of a group of kids together so unless she wants the child protected in a playpen all day it is just a fact we deal with. As the other children get older they get better at being aware of what to do around the babies.