For drop-off time, try having a favourite activity out to distract her. I have two kids, 2 and 3 who recently started with me and were crying etc at drop-off and now every morning I have an acitivity out for the kids at the table...soemtimes playdough, sometimes lacing buttons, sometimes puzzles or pom poms for sorting, etc. Neither of them cries at all anymoer at drop off because they can't wait to get to the table activity As for the other stuff, I am not sure...it may be hard at that age to change behaviour and will definitely take a lot of hard work on your part. Positive reinforcement works best usually...really praise when you see her doing something right...even if it is small "Wow! Great job sharing that book with your friend!" etc. You could also try to make her your helper with the little ones and give her specific jobs to do and then give her tons of positive feedback when she does it. I know my 4 year old thrives on that