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  1. #11
    Euphoric ! mimi's Avatar
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    So I quess our lesson here is to not take the compliments parents give us during interviews seriously. We get our hopes up and then the truth comes out via email or phone call (if you are lucky) or we never hear from them again. Just part of the business but it is difficult not to get our hopes up with most of our interviews. Heres to a successful new year.

  2. #12
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    I think it's also hard for people to let someone down in person. Almost like breaking up with someone. They find it easier to smile and nod and say all the right things in person, while high-tailing it for the hills on paper.

  3. #13
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    I always feel personally rejected when parents do this, even though I know it's not a good way to handle it. I just wish they would actually say what it is they do not agree with r what is holding them back. Not that I am necessarily going to change something just for them but I would love to know exactly why they are not signing with me, even if it's just so I can know and move on. I'm sorry this happened to you but like the PP said, it's probably for the best, though that's not much help I know. Chin up though, it's their loss I'm sure.

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  5. #14
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    I agree with Wonderwiper. I think they chickened out of committing to a daycare that far ahead.

    Maybe they had a discussion behind closed doors and mom brought up that she would like to stay home with the baby or she is thinking of a career change and doesn't want to commit the deposit and say 100% that they are going ahead with you because they don't know anything for sure.

    It sounds like they like you and they aren't actually saying 'no' to you but they want to keep their options open at this point.

    Maybe someone told them they were crazy to sign on for daycare that far ahead? you just never know what goes on behind the scenes.

    I do feel bad for you that you spent so much time on them though.

    Personally, I would not call them back or email them or ask for a reason because you don't want to seem desperate or chasing after them for their business. I would think it was their loss and move on. I probably wouldn't even sign them if they contacted me back next summer and said they wanted to go ahead because it seems like they are yanking your chain and didn't follow through on what they said they would do. Sure they have a reason for it but it would be a red flag for me.

  6. #15
    Euphoric ! kidlove's Avatar
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    Make sure you think long and hard IF they come back at a later date for care! sounds like they might be the "worry" type, always watching and questioning everything you do with their child. IMO after a 1 and half hour meeting and full copy of contracts, they can't make a decision? something is up, they may be too worry wart, not easy to deal with. Consider it may be a blessing in disguise and move forward.

  7. #16
    Euphoric ! mimi's Avatar
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    Darasmommy, I don't find it unreasonable for parents to want to have a few visits with a potential provider either and of course they want to be very sure they have picked the right person to care for their little one. The issue we providers have is the lack of honesty and the feeling we are being led on. We are a tough group and if a parent says they don't like an aspect of our daycare fair enough. Perhaps it might be something we might change or not, but either way we would learn from the honesty. Not every interviewee will be a good fit. That is for us to decide as well. I don't think it was clear the parents didn't feel comfortable with the provider, I think they are undecided as to what they are going to do and what they want. It isn't always the providers fault if it isn't a good fit dear.

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  9. #17
    Euphoric ! bright sparks's Avatar
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    It was really that they had said they wanted to come with me and they were coming to sign a contract and pay a deposit. That was the purpose of the visit. Had they said that dad actually wanted to meet me before making a commitment, then that makes complete sense but to have me go through an entire contract signing because they didn't speak up is a lack of respect for my time outside business hours. It definitely isn't a problem to give parent's more time to meet with me if thats what they need. Hence why I still spent over an hour with them last night.

    I did call the mother a half hour ago. It went to voice mail and I left a message saying how I was calling to acknowledge that I had recieved the returned contract and their letter.(It was left in my mailbox just after 5am) I said that I understand it is a difficult decision to make and can be overwhelming and to wish them luck in the future finding the right provider for them. I finished my message by saying how it was a pleasure to meet them all and to take care.

    She called me back not two minutes later obviously hearing my pleasent message and feeling comfortable enough to call and speak with me. She said how it was nothing to do with me specifically. They were ok with my contract, even the policy about pick up when sick, which is what she questioned. She said she understands thats how I have to run my daycare in the best interest of the other children as well as hers. She said that both her and her husband thought I was a great fit but they were very overwhelmed and it was one thing to talk about making plans and being well organized but it was just far to soon and having sat down and gone through the contract it became reality very quick and she just wasn't ready.

    Whether people think this is a justified reason or not, I certainly think it is a good enough reason. I am glad we spoke, especially living within the same small town as her I want to be able to pass her on the street and have both of us feel comfortable to say hi. Yes she should have been straight with me prior to the first meeting but we are all human and as jazmic said some people can not deal with confrontation so avoid these situations as much as possible with an email or quick note versus face to face convo.

  10. #18
    Euphoric !
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    And there is no reason given what the parent said that you can't say you will contact them in the spring to see how their search is going. Assuming they will visit a few more places over the winter here and there as opportunity comes up. But then I would send them an email about end of April saying you were in the process of putting up your ads and starting interviews for your September spaces and that you wanted to make contact with all families that had previously contacted you to see if they were still interested in interviewing for the space.

    Generally you hear nothing back but sometimes you get a no we have found other care and often at least one family will want to interview.

    As I said before this is what I would have told them if they had contacted me this early was to get in touch with me in April. I use the excuse that they need to spend more time with their child learning his likes and dislikes and what his personality is like so they can make a more informed choice. Reality is I find interviews done too early tend to be a waste of time because parents will always still be looking for something better and curious about what is out there.

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  12. #19
    Euphoric !
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    Ick, so sorry that they wasted so much of your time. I'm sure you had a lot of things you would have rather been doing with your family! That sux!

    I guess you'll never know what went wrong but you know what? I would send them an email and ask them for a review for future reference in your interviews and for your experience if they would let you know what they would prefer in a daycare as opposed to your daycare and your contract. It might give you peace of mind and if they offer some constructive criticism great, but if not then you'll know you're better off without them.

    At least you have lots of time until next Sept. so best of luck in finding a great family.

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