We don't do the gifts to each other here either. It is one way to cut down on the costs of the season in the sense of putting the money into being able to get the kids something off their wish list. Both sets of parents send us money for Christmas and we basically take 1/3 of the total and spend it as we wish - new clothes, treats, trinkets, anything. Then we use the other 1/3 to buy something for the house that of course is shared and it could be a new bedspread, or toaster or lamp or whatever we have been wanting. It is sort of a more practical arrangement than romantic but at least the bills are paid by January.

Before the kids came along and I would say up to about the third baby we did exchange gifts but it was also getting harder and harder with his military career, the kids, the daycare, life in general to actually get some alone shopping time and then you toss in that we moved every 3-5 years so there was always the looming if we move we have so many things we will need to buy - since they don't find out till January if they move that it often became a wait and see thing.

My birthday is end of February and his is beginning of March so we try to go out for a nice dinner then when it is much slower paced. He usually brings me flowers for my birthday. Not that I think giving gifts is a frivolous waste of money but to put so much stock into that tangible item to the point of disappointment if it doesn't come is not healthy either. We have always relied on the little things from baking his favorite kind of cookies to him helping with a household task he doesn't normally do.