Burn Out

[bright sparks]

I think there should be a new forum subject about Balance.

Giving each other support and ideas on self care and balance between this hectic profession, our families and ourselves. I know this and that works for "everything else" but I think this subject deserves to be at the top of the list.

I am counting the days till I am off. Next week I work 4 days and then I am off for 17 days and boy do I need it.

I am on the brink of a burn out and I am not hiding it well. I have chronic fatigue as a result and desperatly need to crash and burn.

A combination of... money worries having just lost 2 daycare kids so close to Xmas and my sons birthday. My husband has got a new great job but his pay schedule has screwed everything up for my mortgage and Xmas shopping so things are tighter than tight for the next couple of weeks. I started a new fitness program at 5:30am 2 mornings a week but pair that with 3 early drop offs a week(6:30am), and not finishing till 5:30 each day followed by being out literally every evening for one thing and another, is killing me.

My nearly 10 yr old son doesn't sleep more than 5-6 hours a night and doesn't stay in his room while he is up. Sometimes he reads but when he gets bored he comes to us. So because I am knackered from not getting a decent nights sleep, I don't have the energy for myself, so I'm eating crappy and not looking after myself.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, I'm just trying to hang on till I get there.

The 2 kids I have lost are the early drop off kids(they are in their notice period till the end of next week), so the new year will be a regular 7:30 start. Early drop offs, NEVER AGAIN.

I quit the bootcamp until I am feeling better, hopefully the new year I can go again.

17 days off to hit the floor and get back up again. I can't wait.

Just wanted to get this off my chest because I'm really not doing well. My two kids were off on Tuesday with the teachers strike and at 8:30am, my son said I looked terrible and why don't I go take a nap and he will watch the babies.lolol I know he mean't well but wtf!?! My kids even think I am rough.

[dodge__driver11]

Brights, I am really sorry you are feeling like this.... I think I am sorta feeling the same way my 6mo old daycare girl is the sweetest, but all she does is cry unless she is being held..In fact she is screaming as I type...She is on her fouth week... My husband is working 12 hr overnights, and he can't sleep with her screams....

I am off on the 21st and do not re open until Jan 2, and boy even though I am a wheelchair user I am so going to be doing a jig!!!!

Big hugs to you!

[sunnydays]

Aww...hang in there...one more week to go! Your schedule made me tired just reading it...no wonder you are feeling burnt out! I wonder, is there a reason your son sleeps so litte??? He must be tired too! I don't know how you get a ten year old to sleep longer, but have you seen a doctor? I think you should send yourself to the spa on your first day off...you deserve it!

[bright sparks]

[QUOTE=sunnydays;3376 0] I wonder, is there a reason your son sleeps so litte??? QUOTE]

My son is identified as "gifted LD" through the school board and via many assessments including a Psych Ed Assessment. Basically his brain is constantly going. He processes information slowly because his processing style is so complex. It makes it hard for him not to be thinking. He isn't hyper and there are no behavioural issues which I am very greateful of, its simply that the outside world can be so understimulating for him that he just naturally compensates for this in his head. It's only disruptive at night when he can't shut it off. His school program is modified to meet his learning style unfortunatly our school board does not recognize the Gifted LD only the LD so he has no enrichment in school which is part of the problem.

He reads a lot and does Math and science workbooks but he does A LOT of them so its hard to keep up. He has 26 books coming to him for Xmas (new and 2nd hand) and about another half dozen for his birthday on Xmas Eve and he will have them all read within about 3 weeks and he's read every book he is interested in at the local library.

He fortunatly goes in waves in his ability to sleep so it isn't constant but it can still last for weeks and weeks that he doesnt sleep well.

[sunnydays]

Wow Bright Sparks...I can see the problem now! I hope he will go back into a sleepign phase sometime soon so you can get rested! I have no experience with this type of situation, but just want to send you rest vibes...the spa, I say again, is your best friend

[kidlove]

Bright Sparks, So sorry to here about your soon "melt down", don't worry there is nothing wrong with you, at one point or another we all hit that point. Do you think you could have a little case of Seasonal depression? This time of year although Holidays are Great, but other than that, can be very dificult for a lot of people, it's normal! Maybe you need to take a visit to your Doctor just to explore the option of temporary support, just to get through the winter.
With your son, is there any way you can make a new house rule? He gets up too early that's fine but doesn't come out of his room or disrupt until after x am? He needs to know you need your rest, and would do you a huge favor by keeping his "early rising" quiet with respect of others in the household who may not wish to rise so early. Feel better soon, take some time to yourself this weekend and also time to really connect with your hubby and kids, nothing better to rejuvinate the soul than to get back to the basics.....and think about seasonal depression, you would be surprised how many people who are otherwise happy go lucky are affected by it! chin up!

[bright sparks]

Do you think you could have a little case of Seasonal depression?

Absolutly and so does my son. I just got a SAD light for the family, but you generally need to start a year ahead of time to feel the full benefits. Clearly because in our job, even with outdoor time, their is more isolation I think it makes it easier to be effected by this. My son's mood also changes dramatically at this time of year. I'm hoping the light will help.

With your son, is there any way you can make a new house rule?

I love your idea for this. I have obviously told him numerous times about staying in his room etc etc, but this generally happens during the night or at bedtime when I am little shorter with him and he is probably at his worst state as this is when his brain activity clearly goes even more out of wack. I will actually chat with him today. Sometimes aswell its the way information is delivered to him. Thanks for the suggestions kidlove.

[Inspired by Reggio]

hugs coming to you!

Sleep is so very important ~ does your home town have any 'sleep clinics' cause I have had sleep issues in the past and went for sleep clinic studies and they were able to give me strategies to deal with insomnia (aka minds ability not to shut down) including journal writing to get things out of my head before bed, visualization therapy of putting 'ideas / problems / chronic pain symptoms' in a box before bed and locking it and cognitive behavior therapy of 'those things will not come out until you wake', lavender scents in my room, no light or 'digital waves' in bedroom at ALL to stimulate brain even the clock in my room gets paper put over it so it does not give off light , ... lots of different tips and tools to help promote healthy sleep and teach the brain to 'shut off'?

Sending you positive vibes for the New year and new beginnings!

[bright sparks]

Reggio... I think a sleep clinic would be a good idea. He went to his paediatrician just over a year ago who is a lovely woman, but said I should give him a warm milky drink before bed. LOL Nightmares anyone She also told me to send him to bed later because he obviously wasn't tired. This woman isn't a complete idiot I swear, but in this case I didn't take her advice.

I am familiar with this...

visualization therapy of putting 'ideas / problems / chronic pain symptoms' in a box before bed and locking it

It's call containment therapy and I do it, but I know from being taught it how difficult it can be to get the hang of it. I would love it if a sleep clinic would be able to teach him this and other techniques to slow his mind down.

[bright sparks]

Thanks to everyone for the suggestions and ideas and their kind words of support. I think it helps that I own how I am feeling right now and have acknowledged that I know I'm on the brink of a crash and burn situation. I can make little tweeks here and their over the next 4 working days and then take my time off to relax and repair. Sunnydays suggestion for the spa is something my hubby is going to do for my Xmas gift and fortunatly he has seen me at rock bottom before so he is being a wonderful crutch at this time. Example, my kids have gone to the movies with friends for my sons birthday treat and he has told me to stay at home. 4 hours of peace....Ahhhh

Have a great weekend folks