Burn Out

[kidlove]

Bright Sparks: I don't know the ins and outs of LD, but my son is symptomatic of ADHD and I have read a ton on it, one book I read called active or hyperactive I learned some info regarding the stimulation or over stimulation, one of his many issues he has to deal with. On reading I realized the truth to it, when we allow him to stay up a little later at night, he seems to maintain higher stimulation in turn sleeping less and waking earlier. IN TURN! driving us up the way 5-6 am rising! AHHHHH! kids need like 10 -11 hours sleep at night....he still needs the sleep but doesn't always get it IF he stays up late, only to effect his behavior and ability to cope well the next day. Just wondering if your boy might possibly need that same pattern, or maybe her already does go to bed at a good hour, but if he does stay up later and rise early, you may want to concider encouraging an early bed time, to help support a longer night sleep. not to mention, IF he is over stimulated could it be possible, reading and continuing to stimulate in the evening could be worse for the issue rather than helping it, maybe a suggested books down time and relax mode would help? again...i know nothing, just wracking my brains to help the situation! the stress of all you deal with def has a lot to do with why you feel the way you do, if you need anything, I am here to listen......situatio ns are a little dif, but very much the same! take care!!

[bright sparks]

Do you think you could have a little case of Seasonal depression?

Absolutly and so does my son. I just got a SAD light for the family, but you generally need to start a year ahead of time to feel the full benefits. Clearly because in our job, even with outdoor time, their is more isolation I think it makes it easier to be effected by this. My son's mood also changes dramatically at this time of year. I'm hoping the light will help.

With your son, is there any way you can make a new house rule?

I love your idea for this. I have obviously told him numerous times about staying in his room etc etc, but this generally happens during the night or at bedtime when I am little shorter with him and he is probably at his worst state as this is when his brain activity clearly goes even more out of wack. I will actually chat with him today. Sometimes aswell its the way information is delivered to him. Thanks for the suggestions kidlove.

[bright sparks]

Reggio... I think a sleep clinic would be a good idea. He went to his paediatrician just over a year ago who is a lovely woman, but said I should give him a warm milky drink before bed. LOL Nightmares anyone She also told me to send him to bed later because he obviously wasn't tired. This woman isn't a complete idiot I swear, but in this case I didn't take her advice.

I am familiar with this...

visualization therapy of putting 'ideas / problems / chronic pain symptoms' in a box before bed and locking it

It's call containment therapy and I do it, but I know from being taught it how difficult it can be to get the hang of it. I would love it if a sleep clinic would be able to teach him this and other techniques to slow his mind down.

[bright sparks]

kidlove... Clearly coming on here at 9am on a Saturday morning means you have been thinking of me and for that I am truly grateful for your show of compassion

My son could easily be mistakingly characterized as ADD. When he had his Psych Ed Assessment, the Psychologist specifically stated that he was not as she explained to me that once the findings of his assessment went to the School Board that would be their automatic identity given and it simply wasn't true. His LD and gifted status are extremely unique and effects less than 1% of the general population so in cases like his, people generally place kids in the wrong category because they don't know what else to do with them.

His brain is so active because he is understimulated and that's why it's hard to get it to stop because he very easily detaches himself and withdraws from the outside world, which is a common trait for ADD sufferers, but it's because he processes information differently and if he isn't being stimulated mentally in a certain way, nothing gets into his working memory.

My son will be 10 on Dec 24th and his bedtime is 8:30. The reading seems to help most of the time, but other times I worry that he just enters another world as most do when reading but for him it's a much more hightened state which can have the opposite effect I would like. He is generally allowed to read till 9/9:30 depending on what time he actually gets into bed and how tired he seems. A lot of times an hour after his light is off is when he first comes to complain that he can't sleep. Sometimes I tell him he can read for another 20 minutes and then thats it. This often works when he isn't going through a bad period and it will be just the thing that destracts him and he goes straight to sleep. Times when I have been a little tougher with my love I have told him not to get out of bed unless the world is ending or the house is on fire and he will still be lying awake at midnight!!!

His temperment is the same the following day and even if he has a bad week of 5 hours sleep each night, he still isn't grumpy. What I have found in the last few weeks is that he looks increasingly more like I do... chronic fatigue, so obviously low energy levels. Still an okay temperment but then he withdraws easier and it is very worrying.

I think what Reggio suggested about the sleep clinic will be my next path. I have also heard from a few different sources that supplementing with magnesium helps with sleep. People who suffer from any sleep struggles, the majority of the time, have a definciancy in magnesium. But how on earth do I get him to swallow a pill at his age??? Melatonin is the first thing that most recommend but it is dangerous for a males fertility so is not something I will entertain.

[bright sparks]

Thanks to everyone for the suggestions and ideas and their kind words of support. I think it helps that I own how I am feeling right now and have acknowledged that I know I'm on the brink of a crash and burn situation. I can make little tweeks here and their over the next 4 working days and then take my time off to relax and repair. Sunnydays suggestion for the spa is something my hubby is going to do for my Xmas gift and fortunatly he has seen me at rock bottom before so he is being a wonderful crutch at this time. Example, my kids have gone to the movies with friends for my sons birthday treat and he has told me to stay at home. 4 hours of peace....Ahhhh

Have a great weekend folks

[mamaof4]

sleep deprivation is torture (literally) I am so sorry you are going through this. Hope it clears up soon

[Inspired by Reggio]

....
I think what Reggio suggested about the sleep clinic will be my next path. I have also heard from a few different sources that supplementing with magnesium helps with sleep. People who suffer from any sleep struggles, the majority of the time, have a definciancy in magnesium. But how on earth do I get him to swallow a pill at his age??? Melatonin is the first thing that most recommend but it is dangerous for a males fertility so is not something I will entertain.

Magneisum is another awesome idea ~ I swear by it myself however I HATE pills so if I can find an alternate way to ingest something I will ...I tried 'liquid oral' option and it makes me gag ~ so I now invest in medical grade magneisum oil (have a past client who gets it for me and we share a big bottle lasts me about six months) and I put 1/2 cup in a foot soak for an hour and absorb it into my system that way ~ which is also helpful in the relaxation in general to sit and soak your feet before bedtime

Would he do something like that ~ so while he is 'reading' to wind down can he do it in a comfy chair with a foot soak before bed?

Honestly since doing Magnesium treatments I sleep much more 'solidly' and have less pain to boot ... when we have to wait for a new shipment and I am actually out I notice a huge difference!

[Serendipity]

The way you described your son was like reading about my own. He is now 21 years old but even as an infant and through out his childhood he slept VERY little. His average daily sleep amounts were around 8 hours per 24 hour day until he was about 15 months old. At that age he stopped napping during the day altogether and slept for only about 5-6 hours per day. He is still to this day one of those people who simply does not sleep very much. He is healthy and has no issues from lack of sleep so I am not concerned about this as I am the same way and rarely sleep more than 6 hours at one time and I certainly never nap.

My son is also classified as a genius and has a very high IQ. His interests also are focused in math and science areas and can at times be a walking encyclopedia. As a small child, he was tested for ADD/ADHD, Aspergers and several other similar things, all of which he never quite fit into the categories enough to be labled with any of them.

He does have trouble calming himself enough to relax and go to sleep so over the years he has developed some routines that help. He does things like taking a long hot shower or bath before bedtime, turning the lights down low, NO ELECTRONICS of any kind and plays soft relaxing music such as ocean waves or a rippling stream. He also eliminated ALL red dyes from his diet and that helped tremendously.

He does suffer from severe migraines at times but other than that has no health issues and is basically pretty darn healthy. I too am really healthy and have no health issues due to lack of sleep. I just can't seem to stop my mind from going long enough to ever get past that 6 hour mark. 5 hours is a pretty average night for me.

[bright sparks]

Magneisum is another awesome idea ~ I swear by it myself however I HATE pills so if I can find an alternate way to ingest something I will ...I tried 'liquid oral' option and it makes me gag ~ so I now invest in medical grade magneisum oil (have a past client who gets it for me and we share a big bottle lasts me about six months) and I put 1/2 cup in a foot soak for an hour and absorb it into my system that way ~ which is also helpful in the relaxation in general to sit and soak your feet before bedtime

Would he do something like that ~ so while he is 'reading' to wind down can he do it in a comfy chair with a foot soak before bed?

Honestly since doing Magnesium treatments I sleep much more 'solidly' and have less pain to boot ... when we have to wait for a new shipment and I am actually out I notice a huge difference!

I am so grateful for this advice Reggio. Would you mind messaging me the brand of Magnesium oil and where your friend gets it from along with the ratio of the mix etc. My son would absolutly do this, and I would d tooo as I have a hard time shutting my brain down and as the sleep deprivation seems to be whats amplifing all of my stress areas I think it would be an all around helpful treatment for me and my son.

[bright sparks]

The way you described your son was like reading about my own. He is now 21 years old but even as an infant and through out his childhood he slept VERY little. His average daily sleep amounts were around 8 hours per 24 hour day until he was about 15 months old. At that age he stopped napping during the day altogether and slept for only about 5-6 hours per day.

This is quite incredible as my son slept through the night a good 10 hours till just over the age of 1 and then everything went to pot! He slept strapped into his stroller in a 5 point harness for about 6 weeks at the worst point because not only would he not sleep, but he decided that he would scream histerically and ABSOLUTELY NOTHING would calm him. Walks, drinks, music, playing, movie, drive in the car, bath OMGoodness it was tough for those few weeks and then eventually we found a movie that he would shut up and watch on continuous repeat like a little toddler zombie lol. This didnt last more than the 6 weeks and he started to get into his pattern of waves like now. Periods of great sleep followed by periods of pure insomnia. His temperment never waivered and I just got used to it. He gradually got back to having an average of 7 hours a night and he would stay in his bed if he was awake. It seems to be the last 3-4 years on and off that it has gradually gotten worse.