Potty Training tips...?

[Inspired by Reggio]

Sadly from what I read on forums sometimes providers cannot seem to win in this industry ~ either they are dealing with parents pressuring a child not ready to train to be in underwear in their programs or they are dealing with parents whose child should be developmentally ready to train but the parent has no interest in supporting it cause they are content to leave them a 'baby' as long as possible and do not want to deal with the time investment training can take!

I agree with the other ladies that for success to occur for most children A) the child needs to be motivated B) the child has to have the developmental milestones to succeed and C) the expectation need to be the same between the program and home.

That said I want children trained as soon as possible in my program because well IMO trained children are EASIER for me so sooner the diapers are gone the less garbage and stench I am dealing with

So in the program my potty training policy states I start introducing the potty around 18 months with offering them options at routine diaper changes to 'try' the potty but do not force them just wait for them to show interest and once that interest starts than I keep the parents up to date about any successes that occur and encourage them to do the same at home ~ just offer the potty before bath, before bed and when they get up times for 'natural' successes to occur to make connections with the child ... that as time passes through communication with the parents on the child showing actual developmental readiness and interest to ACTIVELY LEARN and when we both agree we are seeing the same signs of readiness at home and in daycare to make the transition to underwear with a containment unit we move forward with full out training ... to move forward HERE the child needs to be showing a willingness to train without bribery, communicate a need to go to the bathroom to any adult, staying dry in the diaper for 2 hour intervals to have 'bladder control' cause we cannot be tied to a toilet ever 30 minutes or an hour, be able to access the potty independently and have the self help skills to dress and undress.

As a result I have had children in program that were basically trained HERE but still in a diaper (same one all day cause they used it like underwear here) because they were not ready at home according to the parent and vice versa children who were apparently trained at home cause well the kid never had to 'tell an adult' they had to go because the parent put them on the potty every 30 minutes for 15 minutes to ensure no accidents and as a result still in a diaper here because they were not ready here according to my criteria cause they were not telling me they needed to go nor able to hold their bladder cause they'd never had that expectation at home.

Personally I will not force or bribe a child to sit on the potty ~ the reward for using the toilet should be intrinsic ~ being trained means independence and freedom and a high five for your mastering a new skill .... IMO it does not mean candy, stickers or a new toy and while I am on my soap box in our society we really need to reflect on the practice of dangling 'external carrots' in front of each other to get the expected behavior because it is a dangerous slippery slope we create for children cause well it seems more and more no one does anything anymore cause it is the 'right thing to do' they all expect some external ticker tape parade for every thing they do ... we have lost the meaning of internal gratification ~ doing things cause it is right and feels good in our own hearts to do a job well

Another tip or trick that works with me here when a child is developmentally ready and the only thing lacking is 'motivation' to actually train is using natural consequences for children as that motivation ... lets face it diapering or cleaning up an accident takes more TIME for everyone it is WHY we want children trained cause it is just quicker and easier ... so in my program once you have all the other skills for training and this is the 'expectation' of you now to use the bathroom if you tell me you have to go to the washroom I will save your spot at whatever activity you are doing or put your toy up so no one can have a turn while you run to the bathroom and go however if you soil your diaper or underwear and we have to change you than your turn at whatever activity or toy you were using at that time is DONE for the play period until everyone else has had a turn with it because well it is not fair for the other children to WAIT for the time it takes to change your diaper, clean up the mess from it and so forth ... this is not meant as punishment and is shared in a matter of fact normal voice tone and logical manner with children ... it MOTIVATES them to want to be trained because it is a currency that makes sense and they understand!

I suggest the same motivation technique at home for those clients feel the need to dangle a carrot in front of their child ... do not reward with food or stickers reward your children with your TIME ... if you are having to spend your time cleaning up accidents, doing laundry or steam cleaning little puddles off your carpets from accidents than you have less TIME with your children as a result ... make tthe reward for using the potty VISUAL for them by letting them choose something out of the 'TIME WITH PARENT JAR' that has special things in you like to do together in the evenings or on weekends and when they are using the potty all day than you choose something out of that to do with the FREE TIME that created by that mastery of the new skill ... if they had accidents no big deal, no need to punish or get angry just matter of fact at the end of the day you do not get to choose something out of that jar tonight cause well sorry but mama and daddy do not have the time today cause we had to be changing your diaper and cleaning up your mess all night .... natural, logical consequence and therefore motivation for a child to want to train .... because at the heart of it all children just want TIME with us

I use that same 'motivation' for supporting quiet time in the program with 'non nappers' ... I need quiet time to get my adult chores done and when they give me that time by laying quietly and resting than I have TIME in the afternoon to do fun activities like creative art, sensory or special things that they enjoy ~ if they do NOT give me that support than I do not have the time or energy to give them MY TIME later and they end up with quiet activities in the afternoon ... works like a charm!