Need to vent... Parents mad that I took 2 sick days this month

[playfelt]

I think if it had been any other time of year there wouldn't have been as much objection from the family but it is month end, year end and busy for many people at work not to mention seasonal activities and people at work also sick, etc. - just lots of factors parents are facing. That does not excuse their rudeness just explains it a little.

One of the downfalls of home care for sure is the chance of being left suddenly without care when a caregiver closes due to illness. Even though we warn them at interviews it always catches them off guard when it actually happens.

Leaving out the other issues you have with this family since they are separate issues just adding to the annoyance and anger at this point but I can see in a similar situation where my daycare parents might be upset if I decided to close just to have a day to cuddle with my kids. Yes your children have ear infections but as the mom of 4 I realize life has to go on when one or more of them are sick. That means opening daycare as usual. It means not doing programming and having lots of freeplay for the daycare kids while I sit on the couch and cuddle one of my own. It means turning on the tv or putting on a movie to get quiet. And in reality it is only 3-4 hours in the morning that you would have had to deal with because naptime takes care of the need for quiet in the afternoon. If your own children were up in the night then they probably would be able to be in their own beds in their own rooms for a quiet rest during the daycare morning. I guess what I am saying is I would question whether the situation warranted closing daycare or not too just like the parents did. Yes we stayed home to be with our own kids but if we are going to open a home daycare and be professionals it means there are days we have to "go to work" as normal and still care for our own children when they are not up to par. I also get that you have been sick and your strength was already taxed and for sure that complicates things in terms of meeting everyone's needs including your own. As I said at the beginning, had it been any other time of the year there might not have been as much objection to the closure.

[Manue]

I think if it had been any other time of year there wouldn't have been as much objection from the family but it is month end, year end and busy for many people at work not to mention seasonal activities and people at work also sick, etc. - just lots of factors parents are facing. That does not excuse their rudeness just explains it a little.

One of the downfalls of home care for sure is the chance of being left suddenly without care when a caregiver closes due to illness. Even though we warn them at interviews it always catches them off guard when it actually happens.

Leaving out the other issues you have with this family since they are separate issues just adding to the annoyance and anger at this point but I can see in a similar situation where my daycare parents might be upset if I decided to close just to have a day to cuddle with my kids. Yes your children have ear infections but as the mom of 4 I realize life has to go on when one or more of them are sick. That means opening daycare as usual. It means not doing programming and having lots of freeplay for the daycare kids while I sit on the couch and cuddle one of my own. It means turning on the tv or putting on a movie to get quiet. And in reality it is only 3-4 hours in the morning that you would have had to deal with because naptime takes care of the need for quiet in the afternoon. If your own children were up in the night then they probably would be able to be in their own beds in their own rooms for a quiet rest during the daycare morning. I guess what I am saying is I would question whether the situation warranted closing daycare or not too just like the parents did. Yes we stayed home to be with our own kids but if we are going to open a home daycare and be professionals it means there are days we have to "go to work" as normal and still care for our own children when they are not up to par. I also get that you have been sick and your strength was already taxed and for sure that complicates things in terms of meeting everyone's needs including your own. As I said at the beginning, had it been any other time of the year there might not have been as much objection to the closure.

Yes I do understand this is a busy time of year, but this IS the time of year where we get sick the most. If I or my children have just a cold, mild fever, sneezing, coughing etc... then no, i do not close the daycare, i let the parents know prior to their arrival what I or my children have and give them the option of bringing their child or not. But we were very sick, i had a high fever for 5 days, and was in alot of pain. My son felt the same way and I couldnt imagine him or I being in a room with screeming kids all day. Even if I do freeplay all day (which yes I do when I am feeling under the weather) they still make alot of noise because they are children.It wasnt just to cuddle with my child, i was very sick the first time and my son the second time. My husband could not stay home with my child away from the other kids as he was out of town for work. My little boy is only 2 and will not stay in his room by himself all day. I understand the parents frustrations, but to tell me that if i closed ever again that they would pull her out and make me feel bad... Im sorry that wasnt ok..

[Momof4]

It's true that we have to try really hard to work even when we are sick. We have a lot of people counting on us and 10 parents and 5 children are inconvenienced when we take a sick day. I've only closed for one sick day in almost 5 years but I have booked off a few other paid personal days for doctor's appointments in advance. The day I decided to close I had such a bad chest infection I was afraid I was going to pass out so it was a safety issue for the children.

The point is that I want to have a really great reputation and grateful clients who know they can always count on me to be reliable and responsible. That is a big part of our job. However, I've worked a few times sitting in my recliner chair most of the daywith my box of tissues and garbage pail beside me and without a voice but it's because the cold virus was brought in by the children already that the parents left them here.

[Crayola kiddies]

I have never closed when my kids are sick and only once did I have to warn parents that one of my kids was vomiting but I didnt close and only one chose not to come cause in reality by the time a kid has started vomiting they have already shared it with everybody. I would never close for an ear infection and I accept kids into care with ear infections cause they aren't usually contagious.... As long as they can participate in the program and they don't have a fever over 101 they are welcome.
I would not stand for someone lecturing me in my home..... I had one family tell me they wanted me to change my illness policy to reflect their beliefs .... They are no longer part of my daycare. I would hand them a termination letter starting that due to a general air of disrespect towards my myself and my business I will no longer be providing care to xxxxx effective xxxxxx (whatever your notice is in your contract) .... Next !!!

[kidlove]

I've had many parents through the years like this...what is good for them is not good for you! They only think of themselves, they can leave you hanging after hours while they DO whatever they need ,and come to pick up with a new "excuse" every night they are late. But goodness, forbid you have to close every once in a while due to the fact that you are too ill/contagious to care for other peoples children (putting them first, due to the fact you don't want to spread your illness to the well families you provide care for none the less) or staying home to take care of your child ONLY because, the facts are....you are only one person and took this job first and foremost (willing to bet) for the betterment of your own family. but they can't understand that. These are the kind of people that will take take take until there is no more to be taken. The first thing you need to do is charge a Late Fee! every time they ar emore than one minute past your closing time, they MUST be charged. This way, IF they continue to "use" you, at least you won't feel completely used, you will at least have some financial compensation for their ignorance, not to mention...usually when you put money on an issue, all of a sudden you are heard. IF you start charging them each time they are late, almost 100% they will begin picking up on time. People will only push you as far as you let them! And in this field of work, we are generally very kind and caring women, therefor.....transla tes to "easily used"! Don't let yourself get used by rude people. You are worth more than that!
Lastly, IF they can't handle being "put out" every once in a while due to the fact that you do have a family and personal life, they may want to choose a Day Care center instead of family care, they will drop their child to one of many random people throughout the week and NEVER have to worry about the inconvenience of having the facility be closed for what ever reason. Maybe going to a Center they can be set straight on the fact that all care providers family or center based are NOT "baby sitters" but professional care providers with abilities and knowledge far exceeding that of a 12 year old girl, who comes to your home to watch your child watch TV. They sound like they need to be set straight or let Go! You deserve more respect, and this family is not giving it! if you can't make them respect you through a little conversation and a few late fees tacked on, please let them go and look for someone who values you, and the fact that you have values as well! Either way you choose to go! Let it go for now and enjoy the Holiday, but first day back......take care of the problem! Merry Christmas to you!!!!

[sunnydays]

While I know we all try very hard not to close our daycares when not necessary, I can certainly empathize with Manue. Sometimes we have to close for our own good or that of our kids. I don't think it serves anyone for us to get burnt out because we are so afraid to take a day off when we need it. I do mention it in interviews and it is in my contract (I do have paid personal days for illness etc) and while I hate to close, sometimes it is the right thing to do. I have never had anyone lecture or threaten to leave over this although I know it is very inconvient to them. And as Manue said, we all do tend to get sick at this time of year. The past two months have been horrendous for my kids and the dck's...one illness after another and then I had a family emergency (right after having had gastro) and had to close for an entire week so I could travel. It was terrible timing righr before Christmas and I felt really bad...but my family comes first and I did what I had to do. Nobody lectured or threatened to leave...they were all sympathetic although I know it caused stress on them as they had to scramble to make arrangements. If anyone had so much as complained, in the emotional and physical condition I was in, I think I would have terminated care on the spot. Yes, we are professional and need to be reliable, but we are human and one person cannot be everything to everyone at all times.

[mimi]

Well said Sunnydays When is it ever a convient time to get sick? I hope your family member is better.