Tattling/telling on each other

[Serendipity]

I agree with daycarewhisperer. I think way too much focus and attention is placed on things our parents never even gave a second thought to. I think that if we give this much attention and time to tattling, we are setting the kids up to think tattling IS a big deal when really it is nothing more than a bid for attention and not a cue for a need. Children who are tattling, are seeking out atttention for something they think is wrong or amiss. I will allow a child to tell me when someone else is hurt or in danger but if they tell me so and so took their toy or said something they didn't like, I too will just say "Thanks for letting me know, now go play." 99.9% of the time kids who tattle are simply looking for validation and not necessarily any action on my part. I thank them and let them figure it out.

I too have a very closely supervised group so most the time I KNOW no one is coming to tell me someone hit someone or hurt another child as I would see that immediately and don't need a 3 yr old to come tell me that. If all they are looking for is validation, I give them that. The skills to figure it out amongst themselves is something I cannot facilitate. That is something they HAVE to learn to figure out on their own just like everyone else did during childhood. If I walk them through the entire process every time, they never learn to do it themselves and then we end up with a bunch of kids who can't take the initive and figure out how to manage things on their own.
I give kids massive amounts of attention for doing positive things and tattling is not one of those things I ever want them to believe is a positive social behavior because it simply isn't.

I like the idea of having the tattler go tell a younger kid. Many many early childhood centers in my community use a talking turtle or a giant paper ear on the wall and encourage kids to tattle to the turtle or the ear. I would think it has the same learning concept as telling the youngest kid.