How to get a 20month old to play on her own?

[BlueRose]

I have a 20 month old dcg. She has been here since Dec 10th.

She doesn't seem to know how to play on her own. She will copy what I do if I get down and play with her. She spends her time just standing or sitting crying/screaming or being quiet. She is good in a group.

My youngest just turned one and he can play on his own just fine. I am just unsure how to get her to do the same. I can not/will not spend all my time with her. I spend about 20min which each kid on their own each day, then spend lots of time doing group activities and some free play.

any suggestions??????

[Skysue]

She will get there she is still trying to figure it all out. Some people's trust and comfort level takes a but longer. She is still fairly new in your care. Just keep doing what your doing and she will adjust.

I had a child very similar and it took a good 6 months for her to fully adjust, mind you my little one was part time.

Have the parents told you what are her favorite things to do at home?

[Inspired by Reggio]

Yes children should be perfectly capable of 'self initiative and solitary play' by that age for sure ~ it could be that when she was home someone always 'entertained her' so she does not know HOW to play and will need some promoting or she could be overwhelmed by all the choices in your playroom so is just standing and watching the others cause she is not comfortable yet to 'choose' so to speak ~ sometimes with children like that who tend to just stand and watch and are slow to enter play if they are taking a REALLY long time and seem upset about getting into the play than I will let them know the expectation and offer them two choices 'it is time to play now ~ do you want to play with blocks over there with Johnny or go explore the kitchen centre with Sally' and help get them started on entering play and than I back off and let them do it on their own ... would that work with her to partner her up with a 'child' to play with initially until she figures out she can play on her own as well?

[Momof4]

All children are different and learn at different speeds and at their own pace. You shouldn't have to label them to be able to do certain things at a certain age. Trust me, I have a 25 month old boy who is so far behind in so many ways that it was making me crazy but he just got it and he's changed completely in the past month.

It's amazing how hard our jobs can be sometimes trying to make the children all happy. But I'm an entertainer at circle time, a chef, an activity director by setting out the blocks, books, cars & garages, buggy & dolls, etc. etc, in the toyroom or easel or crafts, crayons, markers at the table for creating time. However, I don't get on the floor and play WITH them but I encourage them and give them ideas so they can learn to draw on their own imagination. It takes time and patience.

Then you get the ones who want you to look at everything they touch and everything they do and you spend your day telling that one to show their friends and play with their friends. That type of child always wants an adult's attention. I could go on and on with what I've learned about children's personalities doing daycare!

[michellesmunchkins]

I was thinking the same as Reggio, find out how she plays at home. Is she constantly entertained by mom or dad or an older sibling? I had one in care who literally had no idea what to do with anything. She would just stand there and cry unless I led the entire activity. It was very hard to deal with as she wouldn't even play with a toy without an adult sitting beside her telling her what to do with each toy. If she is constantly entertained at home you will need to teach her how to play independently and with other children. Good luck!

[BlueRose]

She is an only child. Mom said that they are always playing with her. But near pick up today, she played by herself for about 15min well I watched. Then she decided I needed to play with her. Its a start.

I was also watching the other kids around her more closely today. My oldest son is 3 1/2 and the other dcg is 3 they play great together but don't seem to like the 20 month old very much and unless I tell them too don't let her play with them. My youngest just turned a year and tries to play with her (in his own way) but she just gets upset when he gets close to her. My before and after school boy is now playing with anyone who will play with him or he plays his hand held gaming thing.

[apples and bananas]

She may need ideas and direction. Maybe set out the little people and the farm for her and give her a scenerio. "farmer bill lost his cow, can you see if the piggies can help him find it? " It might give you some time alone and allow her brain to expand into imagionation land.