oh, I had a family like this once....it didn't end well! my advice to you. start looking to replace. Given this isn;t the first time...it wont be the last! Do your self a favor and move on. I had the very same thing happen a few years back, this family was so screwed up, I was the ONLY stable thing in this little guys life, so I put up with so much more than I would have with anyone else and held on to him a lot longer than I should have. One night same as you, my hubby and I were going out to the movies, and had arranged for the kids to go to my parents for the night.....we waited until just before the movie for the mother to show up, no answers on her cell ,no answers at their home, so we drove our kids to gramma and grampas, by that time we had missed the movie but figured we still have the night together, drove around town with her kid in the backseat, looking for her...found her at a subway....SUBWAY? 8pm at night, she was supposed to pick up before 6....I was MAD...bring him into the subway to her...she is standing in line on her cell phone....looks at him, looks at me, says "thanks" doesn't get off her phone, doesn't say sorry, doesn't even give her kid a hug.......aaaahhhh! I turned and walked away.......about two weeks later, I reached my boiling point, while exercising in my basement 45 minutes after closeing, with her son on the couch down there watching cartoons...she comes to the door....."sorry I'm late" .....I say. "me too" and I'm sorry you are a negligent Mother AND I am sorry but I have to let you go! she yelled, I yelled, she yelled, I yelled! she left, thank God! moral of the story? Don't let this be you, end it before it gets ugly!