Dcm doesnt want to pay

[gramma]

so i gave notice yesterday and dcm seemed fine at the door. then I get the email that she wants to pull dcg out 3 days earlier that my notice included and not pay for those days.

I explained that she had to pay for the period of notice given regardless of attendance as per our contract and i got a rather nasty email tell me that i broke the contract by not giving 3 weeks notice. I gave 20 days or 14 business days. the reason for this is because I have vacation booked and she already had arrangementd for dcg for the time during my vacation. so i guess technically I should have added one day to the date even though i wasnt available. she claims to be disappointed but clearly she's angry given all the capital letters and exclamation points in her message. I even offerd to take dcg after my vacation if they needed me but at a later drop off time as that was the reason for my termination. I offered to assist them in finding someone by doing so information gathering for them. I think i covered myself pretty well. it comes down to her not wanting to pay for the 3 days, she berated me for taking the job on, and putting them is such a bad position with no notice. Oh, and she also says that dcg wouldnt have been here for the 3 days anyway cause gramma is coming to town to look after her so its all about the money.

I replied nicely and said that XX amount is due on Monday and without it, they cannot leave XX in my care. I said i am happy to fullfill my obligations and provide the same care for xx as i always have but only with proper payment. I also said that I want a confirmation from them with their decision by sunday evening or I will assume she isnt returning. why do people have to react to badly. great friday so far.
My instincts tell me to say tell her to hit the road but i'm trying to be professional.

I get that its a huge inconvenience for them to find someone new especially with their hours but why is that more important than my well being? she told me that i should have been more understanding. what did she want me to do? uggh.

[JennJubie]

I get that its a huge inconvenience for them to find someone new especially with their hours but why is that more important than my well being? she told me that i should have been more understanding. what did she want me to do? uggh.

She wants you to understand their situation, but is unwilling to understand yours. It's a business relationship, and she is taking it personally. Stand your ground, be professional, and save all your e-mails.

[Other Mummy]

ugh. Didn't I tell you to expect attitude from DCM. Did you think she would be happy? LOL...

Good for you for being professional. I would have told her to hit the road. However, in light of the way things seem to be going with this relationship...don't be surprised if she pulls DCG out earlier just to spite you.

This is exactly why some providers (not me, though I will start doing so..) charge a deposit fee for the last 2 weeks of care. Exactly for this reason.

Good riddance to her gramma....I say you crack open a bottle of wine tonight and enjoy sleeping in on Monday

[gramma]

I have a deposit of 1 week and i also have a cheque for monday. She would have been fine if I hadnt said that full payment was due, thats what pissed her off. The email was a riot with all the CAPITAL LETTERS lol. I copied dad on my reply because i think he has cooler head but we'll see.

If they dont come back should I try and deposit the cheque that I have on file for Monday? There would be a surplus to what is actually owing but I could send them the difference in the mail.

Oh boy Other Mummy did i ever want to tell her to hit the road LOL. I wont allow her to make me stoop to that level.

I totally understand her situation which is why I offered to help. I know people who might be interested in taking her but I wont be sharing that information now. She is allowed to be disappointed but she needs to learn to act like an adult. Its never easy when there is a termination but i'm willing to be that she wouldnt react this way if a daycare centre was giving her notice. She has no respect for me and I've known that from the beginning.

[Dreamalittledream]

I have to say that I do see the other side of this. I have my contract worded that "should the client choose to terminate care a 2 week notice (2 weeks payable on notice day) must be given"
"should ________daycare choose to terminate care then ________ shall offer, if required, up to 2 weeks of care, payable in advance."
If I am choosing to terminate then guaranteed I have put a lot of thought into it, given the family 'warnings' leading up to, I would have planned for it financially and in most cases, I've already secured a new family to take the spot. The situation of still having to drop off is going to be awkward enough for the family (& me!), asking them to automatically pay when I should have already planned financially for this seems unreasonable to me. If the child (or family) is enough of a problem to get to the point of termination I would far rather end it then, rather than them just send them anyway, have the awkwardness just because they've paid for it anyway. Just my opinion.

[gramma]

I have to say that I do see the other side of this. I have my contract worded that "should the client choose to terminate care a 2 week notice (2 weeks payable on notice day) must be given"
"should ________daycare choose to terminate care then ________ shall offer, if required, up to 2 weeks of care, payable in advance."
If I am choosing to terminate then guaranteed I have put a lot of thought into it, given the family 'warnings' leading up to, I would have planned for it financially and in most cases, I've already secured a new family to take the spot. The situation of still having to drop off is going to be awkward enough for the family (& me!), asking them to automatically pay when I should have already planned financially for this seems unreasonable to me. If the child (or family) is enough of a problem to get to the point of termination I would far rather end it then, rather than them just send them anyway, have the awkwardness just because they've paid for it anyway. Just my opinion.

This doesnt really have anything to do with me not planning financially, its a matter of principle. We have a contract that they have agreed to which states that they must pay for the spot regardless of attendance. Termination doesnt have to be awkward when its handled in a professional manner. I fully expected her reaction to be like this but it doesnt mean that we cant get past it and move forward for the next 3 weeks. Over the course of 18 years of doing this, I have had to do terminations for a variety of reasons and yes some of them go bad but not all of them. similarly when a client has given me notice, I have always been professional and respectful and provided care the same way I always had. Doesnt mean that I was happy about it, but I did my complaining to my husband. If she had approached me personally and in a calm and respectful manner and said that given this and that we want to end early, can we come to an agreement about payment I would have been happy to discuss it with her but she chose to berate me in an email.

I appreciate your opinion, thank you.

[Dreamalittledream]

This doesnt really have anything to do with me not planning financially, its a matter of principle. We have a contract that they have agreed to which states that they must pay for the spot regardless of attendance. Termination doesnt have to be awkward when its handled in a professional manner. I fully expected her reaction to be like this but it doesnt mean that we cant get past it and move forward for the next 3 weeks. Over the course of 18 years of doing this, I have had to do terminations for a variety of reasons and yes some of them go bad but not all of them. similarly when a client has given me notice, I have always been professional and respectful and provided care the same way I always had. Doesnt mean that I was happy about it, but I did my complaining to my husband. If she had approached me personally and in a calm and respectful manner and said that given this and that we want to end early, can we come to an agreement about payment I would have been happy to discuss it with her but she chose to berate me in an email.

I appreciate your opinion, thank you.

For sure, very valid points. She had no right at all to berate you. And you're right, the contract should be honored.

[Mum2Boo]

I must admit I am one of those DCPs who doesn't ask for a security deposit. But I think after reading this I will for all new families. Overall I'm very lucky with the families I do have (with the exception of one...lol) & when they ask me to be flexible I general can be, and they also return the favour when I need them to be flexible.

I have had experience with one family who disputed their start date & it was like pulling teeth to get any form of payment out of them. This all happened within the first 2 weeks of care too....needless to say after various emails & discussions I terminated their contract, but I was out of pocket.

Gramma: You seem to be dealing with this in a very professional manner & kudos to you for doing so

[Spixie33]

Personally I would have let her off early since you can't do the exact 21 days in your contract anyways and it wouldn't be logical for her to start somewhere else and then come back to your daycare for the 1 day owing.

Two weeks is pretty much the normal notice period and would be sufficient for me personally especially since mom sounds angry. I would rather have it all done and over with sooner

I am concerned that you have a cheque on file as your last week's payment or deposit. I always cash cheques for the deposit when they are given and advise parents that they are welcome to pay via cheque but I will cash it in. Otherwise - what stops the parent from putting a stop payment on the cheque if things go sour and you actually need that deposit or what if the cheque expires? I would rather have the actual funds in a secure location to cover the last week or two if that situation ever arose.

At this point, I would just try to exit the whole relationship as gracefully and cooly as possible because you don't want to burn bridges or have her bad mouthing you or your daycare. I would try to keep everything professional and not personal.

Good luck. It sounds really stressful.

[Vtorrance]

Very good point about cashing the cheques. I would do this to cover yourself. It sounds like you have been very professional they are just having a hard time dealing with it. Most parents I know(centre experience) don't really understand the contract they sign so when something comes up it is easier for them to blame the provider rather than take the time to grasp the whole picture. Good luck.