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  1. #71
    Shy notaunicorn's Avatar
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    new to posting but not reading

    well well well the hens are clucking away!!

    I see the OP posted in "daycare providers experiences with parents"

    now, I would say maybe the OP made a mistake posting in this section but I do feel she was looking for either a validation or someone to say it is ok to say no to this. I think those of us that are opinionated (and not in a negative sense) gave her a bit of a start by defending our right to say enough is enough.

    maybe if all she really wanted was posts on crafts she should have posted in the right section - childcare/daycare activities.

    her opening lines

    So Dad drops off his 3 yr old this am and says "now, if you have a chance, make sure you make a nice card for mommy's bday" LOL hint hint!
    gave the impression she was not impressed with the dad being sneaky and underhanded in pawning off something he could easily do with the child, but chose instead to hand the parental reins to the daycare provider.

    her next lines

    I'm good with making a card, and will actually have a lighter load today and would like to do something nice for mom. Any suggestions on a one day quick throw together birthday present craft?
    had a different feel to them. She chose to be okay with doing it therefore she owns the responsibility thrust upon her by the dad.

    where the thread went from there was stupid. It is a public forum. Parents read this too. Providers look to other providers for HONEST opinions. In other forums providers have been lambasted/flamed/mocked/threatened for being honest.

    Those that said we could not post out opinions and yet posted other defamatory comments towards other providers need to check themselves posting in a PUBLIC forum.

    I am embarrassed by some of the behavior this post has created, all the while we should be having each others backs, while opinions may differ.


    and Dodge - saying this post needs to be closed is your right, and an opinion, but I disagree.

    OP if you feel the post needs to be closed you can ask, other wise I see it as a way to grow and learn various thoughts, without getting nasty or taking sides.

    BTW, I have had to put my daycare parents "on notice" sometimes as they hand the reins to me for far too much sometimes. I have raised my children, I choose to provide care for theirs.
    Last edited by notaunicorn; 03-02-2013 at 09:18 AM. Reason: fixing quotes

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  3. #72
    Expansive... dodge__driver11's Avatar
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    I am all for others posting and thats great I posted my thoughts too, the only reason I posted that it maybe should be closed is everyone started to argue...but hey, whatever argue away..I have a bag of popcorn...Just kidding!

  4. #73
    Shy
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    Quote Originally Posted by apples and bananas View Post
    I can see your point. However,

    I don't think we can compare fireworks and a light show to a 5 minute card.

    If I didn't have time to do it, i would have simply said to the child. Well, let's see if we have time, but we have a pretty packed day today.

    I don't think it's up to me to teach the father that he needs to spend more time with his son. My job starts when they enter my door and stops when they walk out of it. What they do on their own time is really not my business.

    As much as you say "That is precisely why child care providers are often shown so little respect in my opinion. " I say.... this is exactly why I put my child in a home daycare when I was working. They recieved more one on one attention. No, I would never ask a teacher or center care to do a quick card, but that's the advantage of home daycare. Yes, I have a daily schedule, but there's always room for flexability. I'm not bound by it.

    I don't think taking on a request from a parent is enabling anyone. I think it's helpful... and nice.
    Wait, I'm confused...isn't Disney the example that YOU gave ME?

    Anyway, yes it is enabling. I don't understand how it is a providers job to make a birthday gift for a child's mom.

    You said yourself that you would never dream of asking a preschool or a teacher to do that so why is a home daycare any different?

  5. #74
    Euphoric !
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    In theory we are supposed to have open-ended art not teacher craft time available to the children anyways so if the child chose because daddy suggested it to make a card during freeplay/art time then that is what would have happened had the child not been in home care but in a centre with same age kids. The teacher's help would have been the child asking for help to fold the paper into a card. Home care means we have to adjust best practice so that we keep everyone safe so no free art in many cases.

  6. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bugaboo View Post
    I think Judy's argument is coming from a place of genuine concern for you-- even if you don't read it that way.....

    .....the group of parents I have now would not ask me what this parent asked of you. Not because I don't care, not because I don't love my day care kids, but because they respect my the running of my day home. I felt like this particular parent was not respecting you and that is why I can see why Judy and the others are posting what they are posting.
    I completely agree with both of Bugaboo's points!

  7. #76
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    So.....I had to think of this thread today because DCD walks in and says to me "I am not sure if you guys are busy today or what you have planned but DCKs mom is celebrating her birthday today. Don't take this information the wrong way and do with it as much as you feel comfortable."

    My mind immediately went to this thread and I was like -- NO WAY ! I remember reading this thread and kind of having mixed feelings and here it was happening to me. It just goes to show that eventually situations can affect all of us.

    I told the dad we were starting our mother's day project today and I would see what I could do. It felt like an enormous amount of pressure to have thrust upon me when I kind of had our day planned out to be outside and working on mother's day.

    I know this dad is CRAZY about his wife though and just wants her to have a good birthday and that he gives the older child money to buy a present for mom and thought that the little brother might also want to do something.

    I know it was not out of laziness that he was asking or because he doesn't plan to do something for his wife. He told me that the wife grew up with three older sisters and was kind of always a last thought on her birthday so they go all out for her as an adult.

    We did make a quick craft today so he will have something to give his mom but it sure was stressful coming up with something at the spur of the moment when I didn't have it planned

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