So I find that for the most part free time goes over fairly well. They of course have short attention spans and move to a different activity every couple of minutes which drives me crazy (especially if it is something that I need to get fro them e.g. board games). I am finding that they do alot better with structured activities get a long better etc. How do I transfer these skills over to free play so I don't always have to "manage their play?" Will this just come with time?

I also find that the dynamic changes drastically when the 6 y o b&a child is here. There is a lot of tattling, yelling, blaming and generally just not as relaxed feeling. He and I chatted yesterday and he is agreeable/wants to do the crafts the kids do during the day so I said I could set some aside for when he comes. He is also getting tested for Aspergers and I see a lot of this being what is making things more difficult e.g. misinterpretation of social events (he screamed at my daughter for "punching him in the face" when their heads actually collided when they were playing near each other), everything is done to him "on purpose," he gets into his own world and will ignore me, the other children, needs a lot of redirection.

Any advice?