Getting ready to pull my hair out!!!

[DeeDee]

So a lot of you know the issues I have been having with my two nephews. Today I just couldn't take it anymore. I was suppose to meet with the SIL and BIL but I caved ad called her right after she got off work. Kids were gone home already. Because! I have the sweetest 14 mo here. He is soo sweet and so happy all the time, today he left in tears with his mom because they were being so mean to him. They hit him and just drove him crazy all day. I do not want to lose this child because of their bad behavior. I don't know what to do.. I told her everything and she doesn't know what to do either. Their behavior is only going to get worse now because mommy and daddy just split. Now that's their excuse for everything. "Oh it's because of the divorce they are goin through so much." We'll they were bad before the split and they are just going to get worse.. Ugh what do you guys do when a child doesn't respect you and another one just smacks and pulls everyone's hair and just try's to harm everyone all the time? Give me some suggestions please.

[BlueRose]

I hate to say it because its your family, but for the sack of your business you might want to give them notice. It would be hard and might even effect your relationship, but you have to look at you daycare as a business. And from the sounds of it, in order to save your business form loosing other clients and getting a bad rap (for having "bullies" in care, sorry but that is how it sounds to me), you are going to need to let them go. But this JMO.

[Momof4]

I would not allow that behaviour in my daycare. I would terminate the family if the parents didn't start disciplining their children and expecting them to behave properly. Since it's family, you are in quite a predicament. However, you can lay down the law and tell your SIL & BIL you are going to do it. Find a way to properly discipline the children at daycare, whether you use removal or privileges or timeout or make them clean the toys every time they misbehave. I don't know because I don't have children that age in my daycare. And I don't put up with any bad behaviour at all.

I raised 4 children, was divorced twice and my children were always very well behaved. They were emotionally messed up at times and a couple of them needed therapy, it's a long, rough story, but they were never out of control until they turned into rebellious teenagers. Divorce is NOT an excuse! I'm living proof that you can raise wonderful children no matter what life throws at you. But it takes hard work as a parent, attention and understanding, with equal measures of discipline.

[Crayola kiddies]

yes I agree that its a bit sticky because its family but you really need to get rid of them ....maybe put the spin on it that they are not respecting you and your rules because you are their auntie and that you believe they would behave better for someone not related. tell the parent that the children are not thriving at your daycare and that their behaviour is affecting the other children and they need to find new care for the boys. give them a deadline of three weeks or what ever is an extra week over whats stated in your contract. tell them that you have to do whats best for your business. good luck

[daycarewhisperer]

They are hitting a baby. Do you really need to think this through? If one of my kids hit a baby they would be gone that day. Family or not, the bottom line is that these two don't understand how to behave around infants. They are dangerous and need to be in a setting where there are no infants.

If my fourteen month old went home with one mark on him from an older child his parents would pull him that day. They expect me to insure his safety all day every day.

[Skysue]

Also for the sake of your relationship with your sister I would terminate!

[DeeDee]

Thanks everyone. Do you think today that if the same thing happens I should send them home? Would I still charge for that day. Today has already started off terrible. Screaming and grunting at me, smacking his brother in the face. Should I just call for pick up?

[treeholm]

Send him home. That will let the parents know that you mean business.

[playfelt]

I would send them home now with a warning to the parents about what happened yesterday and the fact that they were warned by you and presumably by the parents and that already they have forgotten how to behave properly and you are not going to take the risk that they will repeat today. The welfare of all children in your care is important and the baby deserves a place of peace and until they can behave they may not come back period. In effect you are giving notice without letting them officially go if that makes sense.

These two maybe should be in a daycare centre where they would be with peers and potentially in separate rooms to limit feeding off each other.

You need to make things ok for the baby to stay in care if you want to maintain your reputation. Family or not I would not be letting them take that away from you and right now they are.

[mlle.coccinelle]

Oh dear do I understand what you are going trough right now!

I have this 4YO part timer that is always on my son's back... hitting him, pushing him, making fun of him... my little guy is turning 18 months this month, just started walking, getting some molars in and is very sensitive to things like that...

I told her mom that she has 1 week to work with me on this behavious because it is NOT acceptable. MY son is usually a really happy baby... and he spent all day yesterday crying and we are on the same patern today...

I would have a very good talk with the parents explaining that divorce is not an excuse for awefull behaviour! I think your sister will understand