WTF??? Massive Rant Here.......

[cfred]

I'm going to risk sounding like a complete whiner here, but I really just need to get this recent experience off my chest. I'm so furious I can hardly see straight.

I've just moved into my new home and restarted my business. I was absolutely thrilled when all my spaces were filled within 5 months. Yippee! My clients are all fantastic and I have no complaints in that regard. From November until March, I held a spot (with a non-refundable deposit of course) for a woman. She is a friend of my sister's (my nephew also attends my daycare) and sort of a 'burgeoning' friend of mine. She's a single parent without many connections in town, etc, etc. I held the spot a couple months longer, simply to get my space filled and to help a friend. She signed the contract, paid the deposit, came for multiple visits, she was super excited to have her son here. She indicated many times that I was the only homecare provider she trusted and she was thrilled to have her son spending her days with my nephew.

She was to go back to work part time for one month, then move to full time. She changed that to 2 months part time, which I grudgingly conceded to. She called her work 3 days before she was to go back at which point they told her they wanted her back full time or not until the end of her mat leave (June), which she decided to do. I got notice just 48 hours before the contract date of this change. She understood that I couldn't hold the spot for an additional 3 months for no charge, but I whittled the number down to about half and said she could pay it in installments when she went back to work. She declined. I stated that since she had left it sooooo late, that 2 days was hardly a reasonable amount of time to fill that space that had been open for so long, that I felt she should offer an additional 2 weeks pay. She disagreed. My bad, I should have written that into the contract. But really, on a human level, she should have paid it. And really, who the heck with all their neurons firing properly waits until 3 days before going back to work to sort things out? Really????

While I was holding this spot, being assured that she was coming, I ripped apart my basement and hired a contractor to renovate to the tune of $10, 000. I had been turning away a myriad of families looking for care and had a few on my wait list who were definitely wanting in. Too late, they had already placed their children. So of course, now interest is in a lull, so I'm in a bit of a panic.

I spoke to her two days ago at her insistence. She wants to clear the air and said she felt terrible and didn't want this to be an issue between us. She even said that she'd like to help me financially, but after her mat leave when she had more money (this woman makes upwards of $100K/yr). I said I didn't want charity, I just want to work. I swallowed my pride and said that her child could still come in June if she came in at the increased rate taking effect in September and relinquished her sick days for 1 yr. She said she still really wanted him to come here but was a little concerned about her relationship with my sister. I've kept my sister out of this, but unbeknownst to me, she's just had enough. It's not just this issue, but this woman is flaky in many aspects, which frustrates my sister...this just kind of put her over the edge. At any rate, I made the offer. Yesterday she emailed stating that it would work best if her child went elsewhere as my vacation schedule may not mesh with hers.

Are you freakin' kidding me???? I handled it completely unprofessionally. I wrote back stating the my schedule hadn't changed since she last signed the contract and I felt this was a decision based on more personal reasons. I said that this odyssey had cost me a fortune, was completely unfair and has had a dramatic impact on my family's financial well being. She is well aware that I am raising 3 kids by myself and this is our only source of income. She even commented on how hard it must be. I had offered her every opportunity to make it right and salvage the situation, as she said she wanted to do. I asked her to never contact me again for any reason.

Again...WTF??? I know that was long.....but jeez...having a little trouble letting this one go. I'm livid

[Fun&care]

Ouch is all there is to say. Looks like you got burned. Seeing that you had a bit more of a "relationship" with her, I would have reacted in the same way you did. She sounds completely disorganized and just disrespectful. It's good riddance in the end, but sucks that you got screwed over. You have the right to be pissed off.

[cfred]

Thanks Fun&care. I know there's nothing to be done. I wish I was one of those people who could just let it roll off my back (and I often do). But this one was pretty bad, and I thought I did everything right. I feel bad that my sister is upset and I was trying to avoid that, but like I said, this woman is flaky across the board. This was just the last straw. I don't think she's a terrible person by any stretch, but completely oblivious to how her actions effect other people....and perhaps a teeny bit self centred. Her whiny apologies really just fueled my anger and made me realize that there are so many people that don't 'get' that this is a real business and a real livelihood. Grrrrrr.........

Thanks for validating my 'pissed off-ness'.

[Fun&care]

there are so many people that don't 'get' that this is a real business and a real livelihood.

Exactly. It can be so frustrating sometimes. Like because we work from home, it's a casual, laid back business? I think not. She definitely didn't " get it".

[jammiesandtea]

That sucks, cfred.

It's another cautionary tale though, against doing "special", for anyone, in this business. It is never as special to them as it is to us, and they will always look after themselves first, even when it blatantly causes loss or detriment to someone else (us).

I hope you fill that space with a golden family quickly, and I hope you're able to have a great weekend, despite this situation.

[cfred]

Thanks Jammiesandtea. Really, all my families at the moment are golden families, so I've been very, very lucky. Can't win them all I just thought I was done for a couple years.

On the upside, I found beautiful 10mm laminate, high quality for 0.88/sq ft, so that certainly helps the financial aspect of the renovation. AND, I'll be on the beach in just a few weeks to put all this nasty stress behind me for a week. Ahhhhhhhh.......embr ace the little things, right?

[jammiesandtea]

Thanks Jammiesandtea. Really, all my families at the moment are golden families, so I've been very, very lucky. Can't win them all I just thought I was done for a couple years.

On the upside, I found beautiful 10mm laminate, high quality for 0.88/sq ft, so that certainly helps the financial aspect of the renovation. AND, I'll be on the beach in just a few weeks to put all this nasty stress behind me for a week. Ahhhhhhhh.......embr ace the little things, right?

Yay for the inexpensive good quality laminate! And knowing you'll be beachin' it in a few weeks has gotta ease the sting of this a little, for sure! Lucky you!

[Sandbox Sally]

Terrible. What a way to treat a person! I hope you're able to fill your space quickly.

[sunnydays]

Wow...that really sucks! Sorry to hear you got taken advantage of I would be feeling pretty enraged as well. I hope you fill that spot quickly!

[cfred]

Thanks everyone! I've been feeling like a giant, whiny brat today. Blah.....the past year has just been soooooo stressful, with the tanking of the old daycare, the move, renovating, interviewing...the works. I finally felt like I had everything sorted and on the right track. I suppose I still do in most regards, but I'm just disappointed. I had my next 2 years completely sorted financially speaking. She seemed like such a nice person and I've spent quite a lot of time with her on a social level through my sister. I really didn't see this coming....completely blindsided. I should have been more ready for this as I know my sister has been coming to the end of her tether with this woman's painful indecisiveness. Really....painful.

Oh well...feeling better as the day wears on. 3 weeks, 3 weeks, 3 weeks! Who knows....maybe I'll even break my 'no men on vacation' rule this year I think the company of some lovely, tanned Puerto Rican gentleman has been well earned.....