"My latest child in care has been with me for 6 1/2 weeks. My child is still struggling to hold the bottle on own, still struggling with learning routine, has a temper tantum when doesn't get own way, screams constantly at me when I don't respond instantly or pick up on demand."

This is lack of training and the result of protective parenting. Most first time parents and those who depend on grand parents do not know that they have to let the child learn as early as possible.

"At 12 months, is not walking, crawling well, does't go up or down stairs well, takes limited initiative to do things for the child's self, still won't come to me for any reason, and has not started to follow every day routines, like coming to the table for snack, or learning daycare rules etc. "

This part is a bit difficult. It is not right to expect all 12 month olds to be walking. Some certainly take longer and it is not always because of protective parenting.
Also some children are more sensitive than others..even the ones independent at home start to behave like this in the new atmosphere.
Do you even expect a 12 month old to go up and down the stairs?
Some do and some do not. I think this only happens if the child started walking at 10 months.
So, again I think the parents should see what the day care provider expects or sees as developmental progress.
Day care providers who want children to be trained (in what ever way...holding the bottle, saying words etc.) before attending daycare must put this in the manual and also inform the parents during the interview.
My day care provider expected my child to have words like more, no more, water etc. at 11 months. Mine said those things..but was not comprehendable by the provider ( bilingual).She was not walking by 12 months but was running by the end of 13th month and sings rhymes by 20 months.