Split Family Issues

[Momma Bear]

I have a dcd that is engaged to my dcm that has a split family as well. He is verbally abusive to me through text but when I call him out he apologizes, and makes excuses (typical abuser). I have two families to consider, but I am sick and tired of not being respected by him. He picks up past my close time and I have reminded the whole family that this is not ok, he will not look after his own kid when he is off, nor will the dcm, as she says it is his kid not her`s. I have it stated in my handbook that I am not a babysitter, I am a child care provider. I am here for when you need to work but when you are off your child will benefit from being with you. Need less to say...I am at my end, I am ready to give them notice, but am terrified of what the dcd will do, and I like the dcm`s family and that dcd, and their dc kids. What should I do that I haven`t already done. Even my own husband does not want to have anything to do with the whole lot! Help me!

[Wonderwiper]

Obviously you can only do what you feel is best for you and your family. If any parent was disrespectful to me in any way they are out the door, effective immediatly!!

[mimi]

Wow this engaged couple are going to blend their families yet won't look after each others kids and sometimes not even their own? If they don't respect each other, especially this dcd, then why would they respect you?
I would send them on their way. Too much disrespect for you and your daycare. Poor kiddies, but I would let this family(?) go.

[Momof4]

Wow, there's no excuse for that behaviour Momma Bear. Keep every text and email from the parents in question, print them out, keep complete records of all your correspondence and make notes of verbal abuse, document every phone call. If you ever have to provide this evidence you will be glad you did it. But I would never allow anyone to treat me so badly and they would not stay at my daycare. Verbal abuse is grounds for IMMEDIATE termination, it's in my contract.

[bright sparks]

I agree with Momof4. You should absolutly let this family go immediatly. Don't be part of this BS. No respect for their own children so you don't stand a chance.

[gramma]

first of all you have to tell him that if he continues to treat you in this manner that he will not be allowed to pick up and he and the bio mom will have to sort out how to handle pick ups. I suspect that bio mom will not want to lose you because of his behaviour. as far as him not looking after the child when he isnt working, in all honesty its not your business as long as you are paid for the day. I realized that you feel that its in the childs best interest to spend time with hi parents but those are your values, not necessarily his. I personally dont care if parents take a day off and leave their kids with me as long as I am aware so tht I can reach them if I need to.