Need help and support

[cfred]

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time. I can't imagine how hard it is for you to carry that tremendous load on your own! My best wishes go out to you. I wish I could offer you good advice on agencies to reach out to. All I can offer is my own tactics for getting through the crap.

I've not gone through your specific problems, but have had a plethora of my own over the years from messy divorce, daughter's chronic depression, ups and serious downs with business...the list goes on. My best advice for you personally - Take care of YOU! Of course you have the responsibility of your family and business, but you must, must, MUST make time for yourself so you can decompress every now and then. During my very rough times, I leaned heavily on my girlfriends. Kitchen table therapy is wonderfully healing for us. If there's anyone around who can take the kids for a couple days, take some time (preferrably not at home as you'll work) to unwind and pamper yourself so you can see things from a distance for a little bit. I found that worked wonders for me....helped me gain a little perspective and recharge. I also made sure I had something to look forward to a couple times every month - dinner out (or in) with a friend, girls' night, movie night....whatever. Just something you enjoy that gets you out of the fray and gives you something else to focus on for a little bit. Unfortunately, we can be swallowed whole by the misery and responsibility if we don't forcibly take care of ourselves too.

One thing I did with my kids was initiated "Sloth Day". Rent a bunch of movies, put out a buffet of yummy foods. The rules were: Everyone stays in jammies for the day, pull the curtains shut, turn off the phone, we all stay in to watch movies, play board games, cards, graze at the buffet all day and just vanish from the earth for 1 day. My own kids thought it was like a National Holiday and it was a real treat every couple months. They're all big now (adult and teen) and still ask to have Sloth Day.

I hope things get better for you soon. Vent as much as you need to