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  1. #11
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    I would go! I think that is such a wonderful idea, and a night where I don't have to cook?! Bonus!! I think I would feel left out if I didn't get an invite! However, I live in a very small town and all my "clients" are friends so far. They respect my contract and my rules but I have a personal relationship with each. My two small children are also in my care and all the daycare kids are their friends. My son is turning 3 next month and he wants all his daycare friends to come to his party, so they are all getting an invite. The kids at daycare form nice relationships together too, and are often each others only friends, I think it is nice if you could foster those relationships outside of care.

  2. #12
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    I think I would have a previous commitment that night. I like my dcc just fine, and their families too, but when it's home time, I can't wait to get my quiet house back. I have no desire to socialize with them. They are clients, not friends. I do have two who work together and have become friends, with playdates on the weekend with each other, and I think that's lovely. But I don't really want to encourage them all to become a "group." I can see trouble there.

  3. #13
    Euphoric ! mimi's Avatar
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    The first thought that comes to mind is the chats and comparing of daycare notes that will occur especially if you are not there. While I would not like to mix business with my personal time, you may want to look at this as a business event and approach your interaction and demenour that way.
    This could be a way of promoting continued good will as a decline of the invitation to a group daycare event - even though you are not the one hosting - might be seen as a snub no matter what your excuse would be for not going.
    You can go, you don't have to stay long and have a chat with everyone. This way if a snub feeling did occur with your absence, and lets face it, in a group, someone is going to feel that way and express it at least by showing up for awhile you can nip that in the bud.

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  5. #14
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    I don't see anything wrong with this because it is a daycare event in the sense that it isn't a family inviting you to attend a function with their family and friends it is just for the daycare families. I blur the lines on confidentiality in home care too in the sense that my families do know a lot about each other as it effects their child in the sense of knowing when the baby is teething and therefore circletime may be a bust or families let me know when I can share info such as they are having a new baby.

    Also the family asked permission and that was the time to say thank you for the kind gesture but I make it a policy to not mix business and pleasure and to have nipped it in the bud then. Since you agreed to it happening then you sort of should go or at least put in an appearance even if you don't stay very long.

    As someone else mentioned the daycare kids are our young kids friends and as such cultivating the friendships can actually make daycare go better as the group feels more like a family and the adults come to realize that what they do or don't do effects the whole group.

  6. #15
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    I would go. The only reason these people know each other is because of you!
    Enjoy it!

  7. #16
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    I agree with Playfelt, what she wrote makes sense. Approach it as a daycare function, go and mingle but keep it professional. I think it is similar to a teacher going to school functions, all the parents are getting together with the teachers and students in order to form a sense of community.

    And unless you have something to hide, I wouldn't be worried about parents comparing notes. You have a safe home, take care of the daycare kids and have a parent policy handbook that everyone follows, correct?

    Maybe next time you can be prepared with the 'I don't mix business with pleasure' explanation.

  8. #17
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    Thank you all with your responses. I appreciate all your opinions and it is nice to see so much diversity in your answers. I am still undecided if I will go. Playfelt is right in that I should have opted out when it was first mentioned to me but it actually sounded like a great idea until I had a chance to reflect.

    If I am to go it will be treated as if a business event e.g. make an appearance and keep it professional. I have nothing to hide if my parents all start chatting as the rules are the same for everyone. Plus I am sure all my families are quite happy with me and tell me as much.

  9. #18
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    I actually had this exact same thing happen a couple of years ago and I went with my family. It was actually quite nice and I know that all the families enjoyed getting to know each other a bit. In fact, they liked it so much that the same family hosted again last summer and I attended again. It actually did not affect my business relationship with any of my families. It did not become any more than a get-together and I was glad I had attended. I don't normally mix business and friendship, but I saw this as something akin to an office party...you go, you don't say anything you will regret later and everyone is happy you came I will not invite dck's to my kids' parties unless they are no longer in my care...I have never been invited to one of their parties so I'll cross that bridge if and when it happens.

  10. #19
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    It's not the most popular answer, but I love having my daycare parents involved with each other. I've always hosted family events at my home for clients and have never had a problem with them comparing notes in any way that isn't completely positive. I also host 'Mother's Dinners' with the specific purpose of clients getting to know each other and keeping lines of communication open among all of us. My clients are all extremely comfortable with me and know me quite well. When they invite me to do things with them or their families, I happily accept. I recently got a ride to the airport with one family as we were traveling on the same day. They had even invited me to their wedding in Cuba, but my ticket to PR was already booked, otherwise I would have gone. Their son held my hand all the way to the airport, smiling the whole way (not bad for 3am!). Hell, I've even traveled overseas and gone on camping trips with some clients. I love it and would never, ever trade those experiences for professionalism. And you can be sure that while sitting on a patio in Honduras drinking wine, it got a little less than professional. But it was awesome!!! Everyone runs their businesses differently. Do whatever works best for you. BUT, I will say this - letting clients into your personal life can lend itself well to the business as it offers complete transparency to you, your personality and to theirs as well. I consider my clients to be friends.....so far, it's done well by me.
    Last edited by cfred; 05-23-2013 at 02:01 PM.

  11. #20
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    I had a parent ask me last year if I was going to have BBQ, I danced around that question as I don't mix personal with business. With that said how can you not go? My fear would be what are they saying if I'm not there that just gives them way more freedom to talk about me and compare notes. LOL call me paranoid!

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