Interesting Article

[JennJubie]

Ritalin made an enormous change for the better in my son. No one can ever accuse me of not doing my very best to avoid meds. I get very, very frustrated with people who judge parents who use the meds and always have a 'better solution' for us. My very favourites are those very special self proclaimed experts who read a few articles, studies and tell me how wrong I am and that I'm damaging my child. I find very often that these folks don't have kids or work with them. Gotta love 'em! Sometimes dietary changes, allergy testing and behaviour modifications just aren't enough.

Thank you, Cfred. My husband and I also made the decision to place our son on medication. We have tried natural remedies, dietary changes (which are still in effect even with meds).... and so on. We took over a year to make the actual decision, and it was a painful one, but I knew it was the right one when he came home from school one day and told me, "Mom, I'm happy now. I feel normal like the other kids. Things don't feel as fast now"

It's heartbreaking to watch your child go through something like this. To take every suggestion, try every homeopathic alternative, to follow strict rules and routines, only for it to make very minimal difference. Now we find with all the above, plus the medication, we see our loving, wonderful son shining through. Is his behaviour still rough at times? Sure. The medication is not a magic wand that will fix all, but only something to help them slow down and focus as you teach them how to deal with their condition.

[sunnydays]

Cfred and Jennjubie, thanky ou for sharing your stories and I sincerely hope you do not feel I was attacking you in my earlier post. I recognize that for some kids, this is the only way and I can see that you are both dedicated and wonderful mothers who are doing what is best for your kids. I think it is just the assumption that every hyperactive behaviour is ADHD that I find troubling...the misdiagnosis and overdiagnosis. Obviously, for some kids medication is the right thing to do, but just as you went through a process, it shouldn't be the first and only action IMO.

[cfred]

Lol...yeah, he's still a little rough. It might be that I feel it more now because he's 6'1" and towers over me! He's been off his meds now for a couple years, but it was touch and go for a while. He now seems to have himself under control for the most part. The ADHD I see in him now is he still has that 'buzzing' way about him. If your child is ADHD, you know what I mean. Can't walk into a room without drumming on stuff, touching things, bugging whoever's there or peppering me with questions. He almost vibrates! I've talked to him about conversational skills and have worked on that for years. I'm sure you're familiar with the feeling that you're being talked at rather than with? He'll shoot a question at me, then when I'm half through a sentence, there's the next one. Gawd! It's like he's not really listening, but waiting till it's his turn to say what he wants to say next. It's getting better though and I can see improvement. When he was little, it was almost unbearable! The biggest problem he has now is a bit of lack of impulse control and the ability when horsing around to see when enough is enough already.

I have also maintained some of the old ways of dealing with his behaviours, which at his age is waning. He chronically complains that 'there's NOTHING TO EAT MOM!!!". We have loads of food, but there's no processed crap. God forbid he should have to eat an apple! If you haven't hit the teen years, may the force be with you Fortunately for me, my son is gullible. Amazingly so. If he threatens to leave (only did it a couple times) I offer to help him pack and call his dad for him. He refused to get in the car once after a school BBQ (younger for this one). I told him that was fine, but there was a thunderstorm coming, so don't stand under any trees, got in the car and started to back out. LOL.....the boy can run!

And like your son, mine also commented that he found it easier to behave on his meds. I feel whole heartedly that it was the right decision.

So far as a past comment posted about the negative effects of ritalin on the growth of children:
BS.....I don't buy it for a second. My son is 16 and 6'1" and still growing. My neighbour's son who was on it since he was 5 and is now 21 is 6'4". The meds can effect the appetite, but that can be countered. I found the key was to pump as much fat and protein in him as I could. I did the following to keep his weight up:

*milk cut with 1/4 whipping cream
*double peanut butter on all sandwiches
*slather on the butter
*cream cheese, whipping cream and cheddar in mashed potatoes
*high fat yogourt on pancakes,french toast
*Protein supplements in his "Funky Monkey" shakes
*Milo every morning for breakfast
*breakfast is biggest meal of day as meds haven't kicked in - always a huge breakfast of eggs, meat, toast, fruit, yogourt, etc......
*feed dinner as soon as meds wear off when appetite is strong.
*mulitiple kinds of nuts around for free snacking

[sunnydays]

Cfred, my teenaged son who does not have ADHD always complains that there is nothing to eat too LOL. I am like you, I don't buy junk food and refuse to give in to the "but all my friends have cookies in their lunches" type of argument

[JennJubie]

Cfred, I'm nodding my head through your entire post. "Buzzing" is as good a term as any for the energy that seems to roll off of them! I also find you can tell when my son is going to have an especially active day... he gets this wild look in his eyes.
As far as the diet goes, he's still young. I hide a lot of food in other foods. I mentioned in another thread that he also has Asperger's and that can be very challenging in and of itself. He is most certainly not gullible! He's smart enough to think circles around most of the adults around him, so we use a lot of redirection!

[cfred]

Cfred and Jennjubie, thanky ou for sharing your stories and I sincerely hope you do not feel I was attacking you in my earlier post. I recognize that for some kids, this is the only way and I can see that you are both dedicated and wonderful mothers who are doing what is best for your kids. I think it is just the assumption that every hyperactive behaviour is ADHD that I find troubling...the misdiagnosis and overdiagnosis. Obviously, for some kids medication is the right thing to do, but just as you went through a process, it shouldn't be the first and only action IMO.

Oh no, I didn't feel attacked and wouldn't expect to in a forum involving my peers. Unfortunately, Ritalin has had such a bad rap because of it's overuse. Typically, the people I become frustrated with are the people who have no business whatsoever imparting their wisdom upon me. The best I had was a friend's daughter, fresh out of university. She had all kinds of things to say about the potential damage to my child, a better course of action and, of course how I could change my strategies to deal with his behaviour. I invited her to spend a week in my house whilst I went away on vacation and see if that didn't change her views a little. As she watched my son running in circles, wild eyed and yelling, she declined my offer and apologized. I actually 'used up' babysitters! We paid 'danger pay' if they were in tears when we came home. I put him in a daycare centre for mornings, 5 days/wk so I could have a break. He made his provider cry on a regular basis so I was asked to reduce his time to every other day to give his teacher a chance to 'regroup'. Good times I can laugh now, but holy s%#& that was a tough haul! And yes, I agree that it shouldn't be the first course of action, nor the only one. It needs to be used in conjunction with behaviour modifications and diet.

It's a simple fact that if you haven't lived it, you can't possibly know how to handle it or what it's like to live in it. Every family is different, as is every child and their level of ADHD. I can say with all honesty that as much as I love my son, I wouldn't repeat the early years if you paid me. It was a horrendous, confusing, exhausting time full of self doubt and concern that I was going to 'poison' my child. It was a tremendous strain my me, my marriage, my other children. In the end, when I was backed into a corner having exhausted all other methods, the meds were what worked. And there are certain 'telltale' signs of ADHD that are unmistakable and def not normal. The 'wild, darting eyes', the near vibrating state, the constant (CONSTANT) fidgeting, zero impulse control, jerky bodily movements, night terrors, fixating and obsessing over things (redirect all you want, they're still way back at the thing they're fixating on). It's quite a thing to behold.

I can't imagine piling asperger's on top of that. Jeez....the patience of a saint!

[Judy Trickett]

I couldn't agree more with that article.