15 month old: persistent crying, whining until he vomits.. HELP!!

[DaycareMiss]

Hi folks, I look forward to your responses!

I have a part time 15 month old reaking havoc in my home daycare. If I didn't know how old he was, I would guess 9 months old. He is barely mobile, and super high maintenance. He will not go to sleep on his own, I have to cradle him to sleep every time. When I try to put him in a playpen for nap time he cries before I even get in the room. He throws up as I try and put him in the playpen, every time! He is constantly whining/crying all day. He doesn't eat anything except the rice cakes his mom sends for him. When I introduce something new (food) to him he gags & throws up.

I'm at the end of my rope with cleaning up vomit 2-3 times a day. I have spoke with parents a few times about getting him to go to sleep on his own (Mom lays down with him at nap time) & she blames the vomiting on a high gag reflex (which is fine but i cant be expected to clean up vomit multiple times a day) I simply can't lay down with him at nap time so this is causing a lot of issues.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

[Crayola kiddies]

Well if the parents are not willing to work with you.... Meaning mom has to stop laying down with him and therefore learning to self soothe .... And giving him finger foods at home other then rice cakes as there really is not a lot of nutritional value in them anyway....Then you are going to have to just put him in the playpen with a fan running (or sone other white noise) to drown out the crying and walk away and clean up the Puke later and put food on his tray (not rice cakes)and just let him figure it out or terminate .... I usually give my parents a list of things to work on prior to starting care.... Going to bed on their own and eating finger foods is top on the list because I do not rock or lay down with any child.
I would give then a timeline in which you must see some progress or termination will occur

[treeholm]

I agree with Crayola Kiddies. What would I do with the other children if I had to rock one of them? Parents cannot expect that kind of special treatment in a group situation. They would need to hire a nanny. They need to be used to going to sleep on their own before they are ready for group care.

[playfelt]

This kind of child needs one on one so if mom is going to work then she needs to hire a nanny. He is not able to succeed in group care because his parents have not given him enough coping skills. I would be letting him go and letting the parents know why. It is too late to correct the situation unless they are prepared to do it cold turkey and be consistent which I doubt they will - they started what they are doing so child wouldn't cry.

[JennJubie]

Ugh... I had a little guy like this. 16 months and still not walking. I ask Dad one morning how he's doing with walking and Dad says "Oh, not happening yet. He pretty much likes us to carry him everywhere" If he didn't get served lunch first, he screamed. Didn't get the toy her wanted, screamed. If I didn't pick him up when he wanted, screamed. You get the point. They ended up giving notice and left in the beginning of May, and you know what?? It's been so peaceful here since!

I'm with playfelt, the parents created this problem, let them worry about it now.