Premature attachments and boundaries

[sunnydays]

I don't think it's wrong...but I never say it. I guess I am more concerned with what parents will think. For some parents it would be no big deal at all if they are prone to saying it a lot to people. For others it might be strange if they don't say it a lot themselves. For the child though, I don't see any harm in it personally.

I have a question? Is it wrong to say " I love you " to a daycare child?

[playfelt]

Even if a child comes up and hugs me and says I love you I always respond I like you too - never saying the word love. At the same time I just accept whatever they say to me. By the time a child is old enough to know how to use a hug and say love they have been with me long enough we do have that kind of bond.

[sunnydays]

I do exactly what Playfelt described. I have no problem with them saying it to me, but don't feel comfortable saying "love" back because of the parent factor and any possible misinterpretation... so I use "like" or something like "Aww....you are so sweet"

[apples and bananas]

I do not have the experience with abused children like you do. So I can't comment on that.

However, I think you have to consider that although she's only known you for a short time, she's probably been hearing about you since the day her parents introduced the thought of going to you for daycare.

Kids repeat. Maybe she's in a home that's very loving. I know a child who used to say goodbye to everyone she met with "bye bye, love you" Because that is the phrase they used at home.

I might not repeat it back to her, but I might say "I have lots of fun with you too" I don't think I would be telling her that she doesn't love me.

I have learned quickly in this business that kids say stuff. And if you point it out, it get's worse and continues. I have one right now that says "holy moly!" at the end of every sentence. I'm hoping if I ignore it, it will stop soon. LOL

[Momof4]

Maybe it's as innocent as this - the little girl heard her parents say "We LOVE torontokids, we're so lucky we found her!" Don't worry too much at this point and I agree that as a Mom/Grandma I wouldn't want my own children/grandchildren to love somebody else as much as they love me, that just hurts. But you do want to bond with the daycare children andmake sure they know that you care about them a lot. So I tend to say, I like you, you're my good friends to the children and other such things so they know I care about them.

[2cuteboys]

I don't think it's wrong to tell a dck you love them, but it is my personal preference not to.

I'm not too forth giving with the word in general though. It's reserved for my kids, husband and family, I'll rarely dole it out to people outside of that. I think you can still show people (and dcks) you care about them through your actions and using different language.

Again, just my preference.

[torontokids]

My kids hear it about 30 times a day so it is important to me. Maybe that is also why I take it as a big deal when a kid says it. I also reserve it for family and do not say it to dcks