Would you term this child?

[cfred]

Momof4 - believe it or not, biting the biter to teach them that it hurts was actually practiced by ECE once upon a time. My professors (the older ones) said they were taught to do this when they went to school. Wow! I was amazed. It makes a lot of sense that it could be somewhat effective, but not sure I could ever implement that. Just thought that was an interesting little bit of ECE trivia for ya

So far as the biting behaviour, it's tough and by 3.5, he should be old enough to know better. I had a couple biters here (though substantially younger - 2 and 1.5). I researched it as I didn't want to let any clients go. To me, it just felt like I'd be offloading the problem onto someone else as opposed to trying to figure it out. All the articles I read said that typically, it's a rush of emotion so strong they just do it not knowing what else to do. Biting seems the best way to get someone off your back. Sooooo....being a huge fan of circle time, my kids are most receptive to learning about this kind of thing at that time. I changed our theme to 'Feelings' and had a few circles surrounding that. There's a book called "The Way I Feel". Very basic and each page talks briefly, in rhyme, about a different feeling. I implement a different action for happy, angry, sad, scared, etc and talk about different things that might make us feel this way. We also talk about how someone looks with the different feelings - how can we tell someone is happy (big smile), etc. During the angry part, I get the kids to roar and stomp their feet. I say that sometimes we feel soooo angry we feel like we want to hit or bite someone, but we must never ever do that. It makes our friends sad, makes me sad and makes you sad. Then we talk about using words and assure them that if they do that, I'll help them fix the problem. I have to say, it's worked great!!! We had a couple more incidents, but they've cleared up now. When I hear the little guy saying 'No baby Zoe, no baby Zoe', I know to run and intervene before the bite has a chance to happen, then shower the little guy with praise for using his words like a big boy and show him my 'Happy Face'. It seems like a lot of effort, but I feel it's really gone well and he seems to be getting it. This way, you don't really need to rely on the parents being on board. It's more of a positive experience and he feels proud that he's made me happy as well as seeing that I meant it when I said I'd help him. It perpetuates itself.

Don't know if that's of any use to you, but I found it really helped. My preference is always to work through an issue, rather than terming. In my experience, kids are generally good at heart and want to make us happy. I try to use that to my advantage and to the benefit of the group.

Good luck with whatever you decide