Two things. Well, three.

OP, I'm sorry that your son is facing such difficult mental health issues at such a young age.

It's transgender, not transgendered. The trans community is pretty adamant on this. Not picking, just making sure you're using the correct terminology.

Third thing - have health care professionals informed you that your son is suffering from trauma from his treatment at the daycare, or could it be a culmination of his body issues, reconciling things in his head etc? I am not saying this is the case, just wondering if you've been for sure looking at the correct source of his trauma.

Also, Skysue. You're AWESOME for informing yourself about something of which you were uncertain. Kudos to you!

Good luck with everything OP. You sound like you're taking all the correct steps to get your child the help that he needs. That's amazing.