How much time do you give before letting a client go?

[Kimangeline]

I have been doing daycare for about 14 years and I have never had to let a child go because they weren't adjusting to care. I have a new dcg (12 mths) who started two weeks ago. She cries about 90% of the day. She only sleeps a half hour max at naptime, then cries. She will hardly eat...cries when I put her in the high chair. She is only happy ( ish) when we are outside, but with the fall/winter coming that will be impossible to do all the time. She is happy (ish) while in a baby carrier but it is unreasonable for me to carry her ALL the time, when I have two ( soon to be three) other dck's to watch. The other children are feeling the stress and one is acting out and the other is getting clingy, due to all the crying. Dcp's are awesome and I really want this to work, but I'm at a loss as to how else to help dcg adjust to care. She was recently weaned off breastfeeding and has never been left with anyone but mom or dad. Any thoughts or advice? I dont' want to let her go, really, but I'm not sure how this will work, especially with another new child starting next month!

[Crayola kiddies]

Sounds like a child that has been carried constantly and attended to immediately. Did the parents do anything to prepare this child for care? Have you discussed the issues with the parents? Are the parents willing work with you to get her turned around? Have you seen any improvement since she started? The parents have to stop catering to her every whim.... Put her on the floor and leave her to play without engaging her, give her finger foods on her tray, no rocking to sleep, teach her delayed gratification, and so on. When I'm starting a new child right off bar leave I always give the parents suggestions on how to ready their child for group care and I stress that its for the benefit of the child to help them adapt faster. While the weather is still pleasant I would spend as much of the mornings outside if she seems to like that as long as its not in a stroller the whole time .... I would want her out walking/crawling around to make her nice and tired. Find out what she likes to war the most ... Fruit.... Yoghurt.... Pasta .... Bread ..... Give her that ... Try to get some food into her to promote sleep.... I think if you give it a few more weeks and with spending a lot of time outside in the am and naps in the pm should make it easier on the other kids. Put her as far away from the other kids as possible for naps and run a fan or similar so she's not bothering the other kids and maybe ask mom to bring a pillow case off of get bed ( not washed) so baby can smell mama. Might help her settle at nap time.

[Lou]

You nailed it, she's a baby who has never been away from Mom and Dad and to top it off she's just weaned from breastfeeding. So 2 MAJOR changes in her little life, right on top of each other. She's sad and confused. I would talk to the parents about it, and express your concerns for the group as a whole, and give them a time frame in which you hope to see improvement...say by the end of Sept. If by that time, it isn't getting any better, I would give the 2 weeks notice and cut them loose. Good luck!!

[Kimangeline]

the parents are great...willing to do whatever will help...pretty sure dad caters more than mom. I'm doing all those things you suggested, so I guess I'm on the right track! thank you for your input! I was thinking a few more weeks too.

[Kimangeline]

i'm glad others are of the same mind as me..I was thinking another 2 weeks or so..thanks!

[Sassygirl]

In fact I wonder if you have the same dcg that I had to term in August LOL!
Identical issues. The family was amazing! Interviewed them and took their deposit and holding fee back in Feb for a July start! Thats how much they liked me. I had given the parents a copy of my handout I give out How to Prepare your child for daycare. We kept in touch throughout.
Found out that dcg is held ALLLLLL the time when home and with her grandparents when they babysit her.
I gave the parents a 2 week warning halfway through July. Couldn't deal with the screaming, not feeding herself, screaming outside and for our walks... She was the reason why my neighbour called the By Law people on me. Her screaming outside because I had to put her down. I tried everything!!! It came to the point where she was spending the majority of her time here in the playpen in the other room and I was texting her mom to come and get her early almost every day.
I felt terrible but I knew my limit and she was IT.
Good luck and hugs to you!!!

[Kimangeline]

yikes!! Sassygirl, that sounds awful...and very similar lol..remarkably today has been a good day, so here's hoping!!

[Kimangeline]

UPDATE** - we are pushing the end of week three and there IS improvement, thank the Gods! She doesn't cry nearly as much and when she does, she is easier to comfort. Drop off is better - she only cried for less than a minute this morning. Naps are still brutal...letting her cry it out...it's getting better though. Thanks for the tips all!

[smileyface]

I totally feel your pain and know what you are going through! I have a new daycare girl, and she is doing pretty much everything you described! She cries a lot of the day! Constantly asking for Mom and Dad. The only time she stops crying and whining is when we are outside. She even cries if she has to wait to be wiped off at lunch. She is an only child and is totally used to being catered to. Nap time is a nightmare with her! She throws a fit as soon as I read a story (because she knows nap is next), so the other kids can`t even hear what I`m reading. She then kicks and screams when I lie her down and has only been sleeping for 30 minutes to an hour. She then screams the entire remainder of nap time and sometimes wakes up the other children even though they are in separate rooms with a fan. This has been going on for 3 weeks now. I know it doesn`t help that she is part-time. I am at a loss with this one too, as I have never had issues with anyone adjusting before. I know for myself that if things don`t improve within the next couple of weeks that I will have to terminate as well. It is very disruptive to the other children and I need the break at nap time!

[Kimangeline]

i hear you...thankfully there are improvements as I mentioned above and we are on week three now. Now if I can only get her napping......sigh.