Help!

[playfelt]

This also tells me that the mom is scared of the husband and that he may be a very controlling person at home too.

[Lou]

Or they're just flaky people all around, ugh.

[Lou]

Please keep us posted on how it goes when he comes next week! Crossing my fingers for you!

[Momof4]

I have a family who live practically across the street from me. We are not friends, so it's strictly a business relationship. Keep friendship and personal things to yourself and make sure they realize it's business and you'll be fine. I'm really glad you have a solution because I have to agree with Playfelt that this family is disfunctional and it sounds as if they either don't communicate well or the wife is afraid of the husband. That's just scary.

[betsy]

It's so creepy! I have already asked them to do drop offs at the door due to it being disruptive to all of us for the dad to come in, and he still walks on in. I already do have a gate blocking the playroom and he just steps over it. He also walks ahead on in and I then have to follow him... It's so awkward and inappropriate. The fact that I've already said I'm not comfortable with this and they are still doing it makes me feel entitled to do an immediate termination. This family isn't listening to anything I ask. I've also asked 5 times for certain supplies that all parents are responsible to provide and they STILL haven't brought these items. This family is not respecting me, my rules or the fact that this is MY house. He only comes once a week (which isn't what we agreed to either). They told me he would come about 8 times per month and sometimes more. I feel like I have so many reasons to can them, but the main one is the father completely disregarding my request for him to not come into the play area. I also even held out my arms to take the child at the door and the father wouldn't let go of him.

My advice is to terminate immediately. And have someone with you when you do so.

Giving two-week notice could only result in something more ugly - being given notice will sting no matter how you sugar-coat it, or whether your notice is deemed warranted or not. Termination - whether immediate or with notice, boils down to the same thing. It's still, termination.

I had a mom whom I've worked with for years in a hospital before I opened my former daycare (and she became a client) went ballistic when I gave her two-week notice (her 4 year old son had an obsession with an infant that I couldn't even dare have the infant out of my sight. I caught him whacking the baby in the crib with a pillow. Even with me in the very large room beside the baby, this boy gravitates around the infant whom I'd have on the floor beside me when we do his crawling activity, and would deliberately step over the baby). This boy was also brazen....imagine that, even with me right there beside the baby!
I've explained the last episode to mom when she came to pick him up but she's in denial mode and said, "he's always been good with his baby cousin." Well, I don't care whether he's good to all other babies - he's dangerous with this one, and I was witnessing it firsthand!
She then became verbally abusive to me that I told her to forget the two-week notice...this is his last day.

We don't know how clients will react when given notice of termination.
Some see it as a grievous personal slight/insult not only to them but to their child as well....since to a parent, a notice is saying his child is not up to par, his child is lacking, his child is bad....etc.
Some could be very resentful of us because of this, and some can be vindictive, too. A lot can happen within that two weeks.
It will also be a very stressful two weeks for everyone - children will sense that too, and they're affected.
I don't see why we should put ourselves in that situation if it can be avoided.

Sure, your terminated family will experience great inconvenience because of the sudden termination....but whose fault is it?
Besides, this guy could have serious psychological issues. We don't really know much about the parents of our children simply based on our business interaction with them.

You have a very SERIOUS GROUND for immediate termination.

Your ground for immediate termination is the safety of all the children entrusted in your care....and your own safety!

You don't know what this man is capable of! He could be insane.
What normal person behaves that way? Not only does he deliberately ignores protocol but.....he seems to enjoy your discomfort in a sadistic kind of way.

The sooner that man is off-limits to your premises, the better. Keep your doors locked for several weeks or months, even when this family is gone.
While everything is fresh in your mind, document the whole incident(s) involving this family - all requests made, including dates they happened and keep that documentation.

And make sure someone you trust know the whole incident about this man (give the name), and how he creeped you out.
I'm not trying to scare you but there are a lot of things to take into considerations, especially when you've got children with you.
Over-reacting? No.... it's better to err on the side of caution.

[Lou]

Have they come back this week yet? How did it go?

[lotssoflove]

yup there is nothing to be worked out with this family. My husband usually hides behind the corner in another room when I terminate just in case. Especially if I am already feeling uncomfortable. You are in a very tough situation but you need to think of you first and not worrying about him showing up or being disrespectful of your time or space.

[lotssoflove]

all my dck are from my neighbourhood or friends children and Ive had mixed results. I actually terminated one of the neighbours children because of violence towards the other kids and myself (he smacked me in the face on a time out). i see the family every day and the child goes to the same school as my kids and its all worked out fine. If you keep it business then it stays that way. When there is a friendship involved it gets kinda tricky but being firm is always the best.
good luck!