Having trouble deciding if I am done with day care or just having a bad month :(

[playfelt]

Sounds like the mom is exhausted and just doesn't care as long as no one gets too badly hurt and gives in rather than listening to the screaming. Do you have enough rapport with the mom to ask about life at home as in mentioning the things that are not allowed at daycare and what they kids are doing that isn't allowed and ask her how she handles it at home when they do it. Let on you are looking for helpful answers but when she just laughs and say well I give in to make them stop screaming at least you will know where it comes from. Then it is up to you to decide if you can work with the mom to make it stop or find ways to limit it at your house.

If the older child goes to preschool even some days they may very well be bored on the other days because they are now used to playing just with lots of peers and no babies. I would probably try to set up my playroom so that I had one end for older kids and other end for younger kids and a couch for me in the middle to referee from. If they don't have access to each other it eliminates some of the temptations. Then it becomes dealing with only each child individually in how they treat their peers. Maybe some time apart for the kids would be good with the older one going to a program. You will have a better chance of changing the behaviour of the youngest probably.