How to approach?

[Skysue]

Wow is all that I can say!

I have been there before with a very sick 7 year old so I put her in my double stroller and chose to carry the 20 pound one year old while I pushed my stroller with one hand.

I never leave on a long walk or hike without a stroller or wagon in case of emergencies, I also carry a medical kit!

I suppose I'm just a pathetic person because I actually give a darn about the kids I watch.

[mimi]

childhood obesity = early on set of heart disease, stroke, diabetes and high blood pressure to name the major ailments. Young obese adults are getting older folk diseases now.

[JennJubie]

childhood obesity = early on set of heart disease, stroke, diabetes and high blood pressure to name the major ailments. Young obese adults are getting older folk diseases now.

I knew someone who had a heart attack at 18. He'd been obese from a very young age.

[sunnydays]

Skysue, I think it's great that you are able to accommodate this child and try to help him. Be aware that the parents may not be on board (from the sounds of it) and there is only so much you can do on your end. I do disagree though, that it is mean or uncaring to not accept extremely obese toddlers into our daycares. Personally, I would not be able to manage it myself. I have a six seater stroller, so I can accommodate many toddlers and babies and if they are tired walking, I can put them in. But, I do not allow my 45 pound 5 year old to ride in it because he excedes the weight limit of 40 pounds per child and it also makes it extremely hard for me to push. I avoid carrying and lifting the children as much as possible because I have had lower back issues and do not want them to flare up again. There is no way I would be able to lift a 60 pound child on a regular basis without suffering physically and ultimately putting myself at risk of having to lose my daycare due to back problems. I would not be able to accommodate a toddler or baby that was obese as they are at the age where they often need to be lifted or carried and I would not be able to manage that. I also cannot accommodate children with special needs for a similar reason. I am not trained to help them and I physically cannot manage it while caring for 4 other children plus my own. This is not prejudiced, it is realistic and knowing my own limits. If you are able to do it, that is wonderful, but those of us who know we are not able are not uncaring or mean or discriminatory...we just know our own limits.

[eoinsmom]

I've been reading a lot of Ellyn Satter books lately regarding eating, obesity, nutrition, etc. in children. I would recommend checking them out. There could be other issues at play leading to overeating or this child being heavy, and she offers advice in an easy to read and non judgemental manner. Couldn't hurt to suggest it to parents if they also recognize that eating is an issue.

[Momof4]

Wow Skysue! Sorry you took some unnecessary grief on this thread! If it were me I would never turn a family away unless there were severe allergies that would affect my daily meals. But I have a feeling you serve nutritious food as I do, with just an occasional treat on a special day. I would continue to do that if I were you and keep providing lots of exercise for all the children as I'm sure you already do. My only concerns would be that the child would have to be healthy enough to walk at least a kilometer to a park, then play and walk back because we travel almost daily to the library and several parks. Otherwise, I wouldn't have any problems.

We can't control what the parents do, we can only make gentle suggestions. So I really like your idea of a nutrition section on your newsletter to try to help the parents. That's the same as giving little suggestions for any issue, food, naps, toilet learning, behaviour issues, etc. Yes, I think that's part of our job to try to educate the parents gently without offending.

I know I have some parents who feed their children junk food at home but I will continue to feed them all their nutritious food groups at daycare. I know there are some parents who use a lot of tv at home, but I'll continue to make sure the children get lots of activity at daycare. That's all we can do then we have to remember, we're in charge for our 40ish hours a week, then the parents are in charge and responsible for their child's health.

[Crayola kiddies]

I too wouldn't take a child that I couldn't lift or couldn't lift repeditavely with out straining my back. What about playpens ? They have a weight restriction.... So do strollers and wagons. If part of your program is to hike everyday but this child wouldn't be able to do it then everybody is affected. I currently have two 1yr olds that are just over 30lbs each and lifting them in and out if the high chairs and play pens several tines a day is strenuous. No way would I take a 60lb kid that I have to lift regularly. I also wouldn't take a child with special needs as I am not qualified to care for them and I don't take children with life threatening food allergies cause I don't want the liability. You can call me discriminatory but as we are always are saying .... My business my rules !

[Momof4]

Ok, anyone who believes all the info that dcwhisperer is spewing, well god help you! It makes me laugh and I would be sad if I didn't know all about her, but some of you may be buying into it so please, please ignore her! Just a heads up from someone in the know.

Ok, I have a 28 pound almost 10 month old in care, a 31 pound 18 month old in care, and a 21 pound 2 year old. They all 3 sleep in playpens so that's when I have to lift them and I lift the baby into the stroller and booster seat for meals, but the others climb into the stroller and booster seat as applicable. Some children are really big for their age and some are small for their age. If you run into a child who needs help because he/she is obese I HOPE you help the child and the parent as much as Skysue is trying to do, for pete sake, she didn't deserve to be berated in this thread!

[daycarewhisperer]

Ok, anyone who believes all the info that dcwhisperer iremember correctly spewing, well god help you! It makes me laugh and I would be sad if I didn't know all about her, but some of you may be buying into it so please, please ignore her! Just a heads up from someone in the know.

Ok, I have a 28 pound almost 10 month old in care, a 31 pound 18 month old in care, and a 21 pound 2 year old. They all 3 sleep in playpens so that's when I have to lift them and I lift the baby into the stroller and booster seat for meals, but the others climb into the stroller and booster seat as applicable. Some children are really big for their age and some are small for their age. If you run into a child who needs help because he/she is obese I HOPE you help the child and the parent as much as Skysue is trying to do, for pete sake, she didn't deserve to be berated in this thread!

She wasn't berated once on this thread. She was given really good advice. She is fortunate to have a place to come to for free to get such excellent experienced advice.

You have said again and again that you know me and know all about me. If I remember correctly you even know one of the legions of daycare providers who live right by me. We GET it.

Next ;-)

[5 Little Monkeys]

I see both sides of this...it's great that some providers will take on any child of any size but I also don't think any lower of a provider who knows their limits and says no to a child for safety reasons/concerns.

I personally also have lower back issues and I was advised not to open up my hdc but I knew that it would be better as I would have the option to sit down when needed which is not really an option in centres. I used to change the kids on the change table but as they get older and bigger I have started changing them on the bed on the change pad(my diaper change room is also my nap room and guest bedroom, talk about multi purpose lol) because they can climb on the bed themselves. If I had a child who I could not lift or could not climb on the bed I could change them on the floor but how the heck would I get them into their playpen if they still slept in one? If they weren't potty trained yet would they fit on the potty or would they have to sit on the big toilet and would I have to lift them up to it? Could they climb the stairs? Could they fit into the stroller/wagon? I have a couple plastic chairs and a couple metal chairs from a school so that would be fine but there would be lots of other obstacles I would face in caring for an overweight child. I would be a better dcp for saying no than saying yes and having something happen to the child because of the weight issue and my back issue.

However, if you have no safety concerns and are able to care for an overweight child then that is great!! Each daycare is different just as children are different and not every child is going to fit into every daycare. It is up to the parents to find a dc that suits their child's needs.

Just my opinion....