How to approach?

[daycarewhisperer]

I did an interview a while back with a family that had two girls. A one year old and 2.5 year old. They were the heaviest children I have ever seen in real life. The older girl was so heavy she couldn't climb the basement stairs. She got really winded before we got up six stairs and had to stop. Just walking around in my playroom winded them. I cut the interview short because I knew I couldn't accommodate them. They wouldn't fit in my equipment and they wouldn't be able to make it two houses down the sidewalk for our walks. I would have had to hire an assistant for them to adapt my environment to meet their needs.

It was very sad that kids could get that heavy that young.

[Skysue]

I did an interview a while back with a family that had two girls. A one year old and 2.5 year old. They were the heaviest children I have ever seen in real life. The older girl was so heavy she couldn't climb the basement stairs. She got really winded before we got up six stairs and had to stop. Just walking around in my playroom winded them. I cut the interview short because I knew I couldn't accommodate them. They wouldn't fit in my equipment and they wouldn't be able to make it two houses down the sidewalk for our walks. I would have had to hire an assistant for them to adapt my environment to meet their needs.

It was very sad that kids could get that heavy that young.

I would never turn a child away based on the issues you just posted about. This little man needs me to help mold him and guide him to have healthy core values and to help him identify the best food choices to make.

My group lives outside going on walks, hikes, we ride bikes and are always at the park. In the winter we dance a ton and are as active as possible. Getting physical is what he needs.

I am so saddened by your rude remarks and hope that one day you will be convicted of your un loving heart.

[daycarewhisperer]

I would never turn a child away based on the issues you just posted about. This little man needs me to help mold him and guide him to have healthy core values and to help him identify the best food choices to make.

My group lives outside going on walks, hikes, we ride bikes and are always at the park. In the winter we dance a ton and are as active as possible. Getting physical is what he needs.

I am so saddened by your rude remarks and hope that one day you will be convicted of your un loving heart.

Sorry you are sad! :-)

I couldn't accommodate the children. I would have to hire someone for them to supervise them and care for them during activities they could not do. My business is too small to spread out the cost of an assistant for them. I would have to substantially alter my program to meet their needs.

If they could have come with a subsidy to purchase equipment and hire staff for them then I would gladly taken them.

I simply couldn't afford to provide care. It isn't personal. It's just money.

[Skysue]

1st off this will be my last time responding to you as I feel like a hamster on a wheel going nowhere.

You make your equipment sound state of the art? Are you a licensed centre or a home daycare? What kind of stuff do you own that cant handle larger kids?

My daycare kids play with puzzles, blocks, playdough, books etc... what could they possibly break? I also have booster high chairs nothing a baby can break.

I'm beyond sad ...

[daycarewhisperer]

1st off this will be my last time responding to you as I feel like a hamster on a wheel going nowhere.

You make your equipment sound state of the art? Are you a licensed centre or a home daycare? What kind of stuff do you own that cant handle larger kids?

My daycare kids play with puzzles, blocks, playdough, books etc... what could they possibly break? I also have booster high chairs nothing a baby can break.

I'm beyond sad ...

I'm beyond sad that you are beyond sad.

Us being sad about each other doesn't change the fact that these children would need staff and equipment to accommodate their size.

I could provide books but not wheelchairs. I could provide blocks but not safe toileting. I could provide construction paper but not safe sleeping equipment for the younger child. I don't have a worker here that could do the lifting they would require. I wouldn't trust anyone to manage them on a stairwell.

I could go on and on... I just couldn't provide a safe environment and staff to meet their needs. That's sad but we can't be EVERYTHING to every child.

I own a home child care and I don't have state of the art anything. I am old school. My toys and equipment are top quality vintage.

[daycarewhisperer]

1st off this will be my last time responding to you as I feel like a hamster on a wheel going nowhere.

You make your equipment sound state of the art? Are you a licensed centre or a home daycare? What kind of stuff do you own that cant handle larger kids?

My daycare kids play with puzzles, blocks, playdough, books etc... what could they possibly break? I also have booster high chairs nothing a baby can break.

I'm beyond sad ...

What booster seat or high chair would accommodate a 50 pound 1 year old? Specifically what is the brand?

I do birth to five.

[playfelt]

I did an interview a while back with a family that had two girls. A one year old and 2.5 year old. They were the heaviest children I have ever seen in real life. The older girl was so heavy she couldn't climb the basement stairs. She got really winded before we got up six stairs and had to stop. Just walking around in my playroom winded them. I cut the interview short because I knew I couldn't accommodate them. They wouldn't fit in my equipment and they wouldn't be able to make it two houses down the sidewalk for our walks. I would have had to hire an assistant for them to adapt my environment to meet their needs.

It was very sad that kids could get that heavy that young.

I don't think you are being mean by not accepting them into your daycare you are being realistic. There are many reasons a child does not mesh well with our program and being unable to keep up to the demands of the program - walking to the bus stop, fitting into the high chair, not asking the caregiver to lift over 50 lbs on a regular basis - there are weight restrictions in daycare centres for lifting. It also tells you that the family values do not mesh with those of the daycare. You can't save the entire world from their thoughtless parents and it is wrong to think you can. Important to know when to say nope - next as the daycare saying goes.....

[Skysue]

I disagree as I usually only base my decision on a child's behavior, parents style of discipline, and if myself and the parents are on the same page in general.

Making a judgment weather a child can walk 2 houses down the street based on there weight to me is a clear case of discrimination. It is not the child's fault there parents are making poor choices or if genetics play a role in the situation?

[daycarewhisperer]

I disagree as I usually only base my decision on a child's behavior, parents style of discipline, and if myself and the parents are on the same page in general.

Making a judgment weather a child can walk 2 houses down the street based on there weight to me is a clear case of discrimination. It is not the child's fault there parents are making poor choices or if genetics play a role in the situation?

It's not discrimination if you don't have the money to provide the equipment and staff the child needs to be safe and well cared for.

I don't have the physical ability to lift the older child. I tried during the interview to help on the stairs and knew IMMEDIATELY that it was too unsafe for the child and me. I'm not going to injure myself to be a hero to a potential day care child.

I guess you had to be there. I wasn't forewarned that the children were so obese. I wasn't asked a single question regarding having equipment to accommodate their size. I honestly don't know what that would be other than wheelchairs that would need to be pushed by an assistant. I don't know what toilets I would have to purchase and what kind of railing it would take to support the older one. I know the playrooms would HAVE to be adapted to be safe for them to get up and down off the floor.

All I was told about them besides the age and sex was that the older one was gifted and the younger one would most likely be gifted too. They didn't mention they were VERY VERY obese.