I hate being dismissed/not taken seriously

[MonkeyPrincess]

i have an 18 month old DCG who i suspected was coming down with a cold. Yesterday she had a runny nose, a bit of a cough when she lay down, she was warm (but no fever) and had teary eyes. I mentioned to dad upon pick up and asked him to monitor her because if she gets worse, then she has to stay home. Of course...he attributes it to teething and her shots from last week. That very well could be true, but in my opinion, it seemed more like symptoms of a cold, but he dismissed my suspicions. Went on to tell me about her molars coming in etc.... Today she is full blown cold mode (i knew it!). Kinda cranky, not wanting to play much, tired plus all the above symptoms. You can totally tell in the kid's eyes that she is sick. I am not stupid, i have been around kids for 20 years and have had 2 kids of my own. It's obvious to me.

I really hate being dismissed like that. It's disrespectful in a way, isn't it? No one else is as close to the child for 9 hours everyday as we as DCP's are, we get to know the child just as well as the parents. When get to know the child's cues, mannerisms, quirks, etc. It drives me nuts when the parents don't take me seriously. They don't take into consideration that they are potentially spreading the cold to all the other kids, all the other kid's families, plus my own family. I guess some people don't think that a cold is a big deal. I understand that people can't take time off for every little thing but don't dismiss me when i am telling you your kid is sick.

What's your policy on kids with colds? are they allowed to come to daycare?

[Crayola kiddies]

They can come as long as the nose is running clear, they have no fever, and are able to cope.

[2cuteboys]

I let kids come with colds, because I wouldn't be willing to close my doors (thereby losing pay) if one of my kids had a cold. I'll send them home for fever, diarrhea, vomiting, etc. but not a runny nose. Unless they were so miserable that they weren't able to participate or they were too much of a handful for me to do our usual routine. If they're that sick, they need be able to be home with mom or dad.

He should definitely validate your suspicions though, instead of acting as though he's the one who's been home all day and saw how he was. It's a small thing but if he'd taken you seriously it would have shown that he values your experience and how you care for his child. He opted to do the opposite and left you feeling undervalued and under appreciated.

His being dismissive was pretty rude, but if he thought you wouldn't let her stay with a cold I could see him trying to deny it. Doesn't make it right, but it's what happens.

[mickyc]

I had the same with one of my daycare kids yesterday. Not sure why they even sent her. I had them come pick her up by lunch. She is here today although way better than yesterday.

I don't understand why parents do this to their child.

My policy is if they cannot participate in the full day of daycare that they must go home. I do not need kids laying on the couch sleeping. They need to be at home!! Here comes the season. I hate this time of year just for this reason.

[sunnydays]

I allow them to come with a cold...otherwise some kids would be home most of the time! Only if they are miserable to the point of being inconsolable or have fever or other symptoms of something worse, then they need to stay home. I do try to give the ones with colds a bit more TLC where possible and if I have a couple with colds, I will alter our day a bit so they can have more down time. I think this is one of the nice things about a home daycare is that we can be a bit more flexible and give the kids what they need. However, if the child is completely miserable and can't cope at all, I will send them home.

[playfelt]

Just finished a month of kids with colds, croup, pneumonia, and now two with ear infections. I let them come unless they are in tear mode cause they don't want to cope or the fever is high or nose so runny it consumes all my time - ie at the height of the illness they have 1-2 days off but the build up and getting over are ok days to come just because kids get colds and it takes 10-14 days to run it's course so impossible to expect to stay home. I kinda liked a week of going back to two naps a day and serving snack type foods for lunch cause no one had an appetite. I was just as sick as was my mom who was visiting. I also believe if one is sick it is going to go through the group anyways so better to just have them come and get it over with and move on instead of dragging it out.

[Fun&care]

First off, no child is allowed here with a fever, even if it is attributed to " teething". 99% of the time it's not teething! it's a virus and the whole crew gets sick. But for a cold, kids are allowed to come so long as there is no fever, vomiting or diarrhea. Or if they are excessively tired and sick I ask that they stay home but at this point they typically would have a fever for it to be that bad anyways.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I am the same as most who have posted. Vomiting, 2-3 dirreaha's and/or fever are an immediate pick up. I used to allow them to stay if they were teething and I had permission to give them medicine but it is just too difficult IMO to say it's teething and not a cold so now, fever for whatever reason means they need to be picked up. Some parents don't like it but they don't realize it protects their child from getting something too. If they have a clear runny nose and mild cold symptoms they are allowed but they have to be able to get through the day.

I am paid 2 weeks in advance and am paid whether they are here or not. The only time I give money back for sick days is if I am sick and have to close.

[apples and bananas]

I allow them to come with colds and I don't require a clear runny nose. I'll take any such colour. Kids will have colds, as long as they can still do all of our activities and participate, they're welcome here.

I don't allow fevers.

I had an un expected day off yesterday because everyone is sick with fevers. They're just passing it around right now. It happens every year at this time.

You're right, it's frustrating when we're dismissed. Especially when we feel that we are being helpful. Unfortunately, most parents don't see us letting them know their child is sick as helpful. It's a pain for them to stay home from work.

I let the client know, but that's it. If they don't believe me, then that's their issue. I just deal with it as it comes. I don't always need to be right. It's not my job to be right, it's my job to communicate well.

[playfelt]

The problem is not so much about being dismissed even if the parent knows you are right it is about making excuses so they don't have to take the day off work. Sometimes a too rigid health plan can actually backfire on us.