Mouthing everything - suggestions for deterring?

[KingstonMom]

If it were me and I have been trying to get dcb to stop this habit for some time to no avail and have spoken with the parents about it...maybe give them a warning and explain that there may need to be some reimbursement for books and toys he has ruined due to the drooling and chewing on them. that would tick me off. I think you are doing everything right and I think 18 mos is old enough to not eat a book!! I have a 17 mon old in care who had this habit too but after a month or two of my e reminding him at about 14/15 mos he stopped doing it almost completely.
As far as biting friends go, this should be punished wioth a time out/loss of privilege and documented to show the often occurrence of it.
Maybe there should be a termination date threatened if the behaviour is not curbed. Say 3 weeks.

[Crayola kiddies]

Perhaps your not saying it with a stern enough face and voice... Every time he puts something near his mouth say "NO NOT IN YOUR MOUTH" loud enough to startle him...also speak to the parent again and say "I need you to stop him from putting things in his mouth at home .... Anything and everything ... Toys books fingers everything but food .... This is not teething this is a habit and a bad one .... He is now biting other children and it needs to stop .... Other parents are not happy their child is being bit and rightly so....I need to see some improvement within two weeks and if we are both stressing it all day I'm sure that will be no problem...." And if she is not willing to work with you then hand them their walking papers because you have an obligation to keep the other children safe and they are not safe if they are being bitten ..... You run the risk of losing your other families if you don't put a stop to this kid

[jammiesandtea]

Perhaps your not saying it with a stern enough face and voice... Every time he puts something near his mouth say "NO NOT IN YOUR MOUTH" loud enough to startle him...also speak to the parent again and say "I need you to stop him from putting things in his mouth at home .... Anything and everything ... Toys books fingers everything but food .... This is not teething this is a habit and a bad one .... He is now biting other children and it needs to stop .... Other parents are not happy their child is being bit and rightly so....I need to see some improvement within two weeks and if we are both stressing it all day I'm sure that will be no problem...." And if she is not willing to work with you then hand them their walking papers because you have an obligation to keep the other children safe and they are not safe if they are being bitten ..... You run the risk of losing your other families if you don't put a stop to this kid

^^^^ YES. Exactly THIS.

[gravy_train]

i agree completely - at his age it's a habit he has developed and i am risking losing my other families because of this. he has broken through the skin a couple of times, and even if not, i am havign to tell the parents of the other children almost daily that this happened. my son had a brief (month long) hitting and pushing frenzy here but with consistency it has stopped - this issue has been going on for months.
i think they might be giving into his every whim at home so he doesn't have the chance to get frustrated or angry (therein learning the appropriate response). i like how you phrased how i should talk to the parents, crayola - i will definitely incorporate that into my chat. i think they need to stop brushing this off as teething and take it seriously.

[Crayola kiddies]

i agree completely - at his age it's a habit he has developed and i am risking losing my other families because of this. he has broken through the skin a couple of times, and even if not, i am havign to tell the parents of the other children almost daily that this happened. my son had a brief (month long) hitting and pushing frenzy here but with consistency it has stopped - this issue has been going on for months.
i think they might be giving into his every whim at home so he doesn't have the chance to get frustrated or angry (therein learning the appropriate response). i like how you phrased how i should talk to the parents, crayola - i will definitely incorporate that into my chat. i think they need to stop brushing this off as teething and take it seriously.

..... Notice how I didn't say the word termination .... If you were to say "I need to see an improvement In two weeks or I will have to terminate " the parent automatically gets their back up and sometimes its a knee jerk reaction to pull the kid .... By saying if we work together we should be able to put a stop to it ..... That makes the parent more receptive then the threat if termination ..... Even if the parent were to say "what if there's no improvement after two weeks" I would just say "let's just stay positive "

[Busy ECE mommy]

I see big red flags here. Yes biting is pretty typical for children when language skills are not fully developed yet, but the severity concerns me. When I worked in a centre, a bite that broke the skin was deemed a "serious occurence" and the Ministry was called in to investigate. Serious stuff.
We used chewy toys/necklaces for biters, and it went everywhere with them, including outdoor time. When I hear that the child is also biting self and gagging himself, that tells me there are probably oral processing issues going on, that are beyond the typical toddler biting phase. This is not a teething issue, due to the severity and length of time the behaviour has persisted. I imagine the other parents are very frustrated as well. Mom and Dad need a chat about the severity of the behaviour and definitely a consult with an Occupational Therapist to assess these issues. I personally would give it a probation timeline for them to seek outside help, and see some improvement, or find care elsewhere. The stress on yourself and the other children must be so draining.

[Samantha33]

gravy_train, I've only ever had one boy in my care (I've had my daycare for way over 10 years) and he was as you described, although he never mouthed anything, just a lot of biting. Even the same age when he started biting. I tried working with the parents (only child but they said he never does this with his cousins). I tried to get him to stop biting for 7 months. Yes 7. Why you ask. Because his parents were Golden. There was not anything wrong with them. They were fantastic and so was J. One day he bit another child and broke the skin. I "had" to terminate that day. What was I thinking trying to work that long with a child who could really do harm. Please don't let this go on to long. He is the only child I have ever terminated. Ever. So I don't take terminating lightly. I believe their is good in everyone. But this one bad thing was the deal breaker after trying for so long. I hope you get some good advice on things to try to get him to stop. In the meantime. Shadow.

[sunnydays]

I have found for some kids it helps to clip a teething ring to their shirt so they have something they are allowed to mouth and always have it handy. It helps with the mouthing because you can redirect them to it and it can help with biters as well especially if they are biting for oral stimulation.

[playfelt]

I have a 2 1/2 year old that still has a soother during the day and while I hate it and it makes him drool all over his shirt - without it he bites other kids and sucks on whatever toy he picks up. The soother becomes the solution in this case rather than the problem.

[sunnydays]

I agree Playfelt. I had an 18 month old who started biting like crazy to the point that I was thinking of terminating even though I really liked the family. What finally worked was letting him have his soother for a few weeks. He couldn't bite with the soother in his mouth and it kept everyone safe. After that we were able to ween him of the soother and he stopped biting Sometimes it is the least of two evils...