I wish I had advice. I can only comment that you are NOT alone in this. My own little guy (our youngest, and the motivation for starting a home daycare 3 years ago) just started school this year. I can't tell you what a positive change in the daycare environment. And that same little guy that I struggled with every day (he was loud/a bully) and would pass off to Dad in frustration most evenings...now our evenings are wonderful after school/weekends. He is a completely different child. I wish, in hindsight I would have sent him elsewhere just a couple days a week. Although he had no problem adjusting into school and is doing great there it would have done both of us a world of good.
My only tip is to try to make time just for your child/a moment as you pass by to look them in the eye, hug them & tell them you love them. To perhaps, put them down 1/2 hour before (or wake earlier) from nap to again get that one on one time in.