Reality Check!

[torontokids]

That's so interesting Bright Sparks that you want to get into psyc, only because I have often found your posts to myself and other members both supportive, insightful and nonjudgmental. I am curious what it is you want to do after your psyc degree because working within the LGBTQ community does not require that (depending on your capacity). The other thing to think about (as someone who works/worked in the field) is that a lot of people get their psyc degree with the plan to become a therapist. The reality is that most psyc positions are research based (entry level) and a lot of psyc do very little counselling but more client monitoring/check in re: clients meds or psyc testing depending on expertise. Just something to think about. I am a social worker and spend more face time with clients then the psychiatrists do.

[Fun&care]

Wow I am so glad everyone is posting about this today! Glad because I am struggling with similar feelings. ( check my post in Torontokids thread). I too have to be careful with my mental health. I have never been diagnosed but know that I can slip into a depression where all I want to do is stay in bed all day for no apparent reason...and I am starting to feel very much that way lately. I am torn between going back to work and losing my independence or staying and being bored and bummed out. I feel that with daycare I WANT to do more but don't always have the energy/ creativity to come up with new things to do and even then, my group is so young it's not always worth it or difficult to come up with something age appropriate so the days become long especially lately with the cold....

But I do want to say thank you ladies for simply posting your own thoughts as it helps others out there like me suffering too!

[bright sparks]

Wow I am so glad everyone is posting about this today! Glad because I am struggling with similar feelings. ( check my post in Torontokids thread). I too have to be careful with my mental health. I have never been diagnosed but know that I can slip into a depression where all I want to do is stay in bed all day for no apparent reason...and I am starting to feel very much that way lately. I am torn between going back to work and losing my independence or staying and being bored and bummed out. I feel that with daycare I WANT to do more but don't always have the energy/ creativity to come up with new things to do and even then, my group is so young it's not always worth it or difficult to come up with something age appropriate so the days become long especially lately with the cold....

But I do want to say thank you ladies for simply posting your own thoughts as it helps others out there like me suffering too!

With my PTSD chronic fatigue is my biggest roadblocks which sounds to me what you are describing. It is debilitating and is like a mental barrier to being able to function, sometimes even basic personal care and household chores can be the hardest task of the day. I am coming up to my 4th year anniversary of being in therapy. It's a taboo subject still I know, not like saying you went to the dentist or chiropractor. I chose to go to therapy as I got to the point where I couldn't move and over my dead body were my kids going to grow up with the memory of seeing mum have a nervous breakdown. It has helped tremendously but needless to say after a life of neglect and abuse it is not a quick process but I now manage my depression much better and have a greater handle on my PTSD and am working steadily, mostly, through it. When I get a wave of depression or go through a period of CF it is triggered by one of two things.PMS which is strongly linked with trauma and also the fact that I have endo so have a major hormone imbalance, or the job. I feel at this point my work is inhibiting my recovery. Intermittently I have to stop trauma therapy and work on day to day coping because my job has me trapped in a box. I use all my mental strength to lock all this baggage down so I can give my best to the daycare kids, which I honestly do a great job at, but it doesn't take a genius to guess what happens whenever I am off the clock?? I crash and burn, and as time goes on it happens more and more often and the harder I fall. Since September I dropped to M-Th and that has helped so much. I also take about 4-5 weeks a year vacation plus every Thursday before a long weekend for that 5 day break. It is an absolute must that I do this.

I no longer put pressure on myself for programming. I do much better with a schedule and good planning so that's exactly what I do to save myself from boredom. This year I am now trying to put myself first before the kids. I have my policies and parents in check. But I do more for the kids than for myself and look where it has gotten me. For example, I always prided myself on providing organic non processed meals. Now I no longer buy organic although we still don't have processed foods or refined carbs, and I put less effort into their meals. They are still healthy but I am all about the freezer meals. Anything that frees up time and energy to make that healthy wholesome meal for ME!

I am human, not superwoman.

[bright sparks]

That's so interesting Bright Sparks that you want to get into psyc, only because I have often found your posts to myself and other members both supportive, insightful and nonjudgmental. I am curious what it is you want to do after your psyc degree because working within the LGBTQ community does not require that (depending on your capacity). The other thing to think about (as someone who works/worked in the field) is that a lot of people get their psyc degree with the plan to become a therapist. The reality is that most psyc positions are research based (entry level) and a lot of psyc do very little counselling but more client monitoring/check in re: clients meds or psyc testing depending on expertise. Just something to think about. I am a social worker and spend more face time with clients then the psychiatrists do.

I planned to double major in psych and sexuality and then do a masters in social work. I love psych more than I can begin to explain. I love getting down to the nitty gritty of human behaviour and what causes us to be a certain way. I particularly find psychosocial development to be most intriguing as through my painful past some of these theories make great sense to me and are something I would like to work inline with when it comes to caring for children and adolescents. I think psych and sexuality will complement each other wonderfully and while I don't need the sexuality component to work within my area of interest I just genuinely find the whole subject fascinating.

I would like to offer counsel and advocacy for LGBT youth and young adults ideally but maybe also specialize in private therapy with a special interest in diverse family set ups. I had been advised a couple of years ago that the masters in sw would be much better for where I want to go in terms of career as the masters in psych is heavily research based....which by the way I also love. I am very analytical and just love to read between the lines but ultimately I want hands on, so to speak, working environment where I hope I can really make a difference.

[Fun&care]

5 little monkeys I have a close friend going through a depression right now and she is my support system and we help each other. I've seeked medical care before (sort of) but it didn't help and I don't feel like I'm at the point that I need to be medicated. I think that there are many reasons for feeling down right now, as many have mentioned the weather certainly isn't helping, and also I have a little one here since September who is still very whiny and clingy and I think it has worn me out more than I thought. Also Bill 143 really turned me off too and it made me feel very depreciated and honestly I just feel hurt about the whole thing. I know now that I won't do this forever like I used to think, I think I am just going to start planing for the future and take some courses etc.

[playfelt]

.... Also Bill 143 really turned me off too and it made me feel very depreciated and honestly I just feel hurt about the whole thing. I know now that I won't do this forever like I used to think, I think I am just going to start planing for the future and take some courses etc.

I think you have totally pegged what is eating at a lot of us. In one fell swoop with Bill 143 our whole world is potentially being taken out from under us and all the planning/training we did to get to where we are and all the plans we had for our future are in jeopardy.

I can look at this from a very different place than most of you because I already have 28 years invested in home daycare, my own kids are grown, hubby retires from the military in March 2015 at age 60 and thus I am in the daycare could end tomorrow and life would be ok stage - I'll still want something to do but it wouldn't have near the urgency it would have had 25 years ago when my daycare was part of the family income plan.

It is as if we knew we were at the lowest end of the childcare system, very undervalued, and now basically unconsulted, but it has taken Bill 143 to bring it to the forefront for a lot of us. We are questioning in my case why did I do it, was it worth it really - and yes I think it was but going forward I realize so many of you are being put into a very negative place by all that is happening now. Even for those that don't live in Ontario and won't be directly effected by this bill it still makes you stop and think just where do I belong in the scheme of life.

Taking courses is a great way to get some adult interaction and realize we do still have a mind that can comprehend something more than the answer to what sound do cows make and how many pompoms can fill a yogurt container. I used to take one course a session from the local municipal activities book that fulfilled an interest and that was great too be it a craft course, cooking class, home décor whatever. Then the kids got older and busy with their own activities and we ran out of nights - I keep telling myself that is what retiring for is for right. I know it costs per course but even just taking several intro to .... type courses might help you find the one you really like. It just feels like someone suddenly put pressure on us all to state what we plan to do with the rest of our lives without giving us time to think about an answer. It is a scary topic anyways cause really no one wants to think about the unknown future. I so appreciate this forum where we can sound out our ideas and get help to see what direction we can go.