When kids leave....

[nschildcare]

your dc, how do you handle when other parents ask about it? We are a really small group (3 families) so it is obvious if someone is no longer attending. I have a set of parents who will scrutinize the sign in sheet and then say, "Oh, Johnny isn't here anymore?" or something similar.

I have always just answered yes or no but feel like they are expecting more from me. I can understand that a family might wonder why someone is no longer there but I don't think it's any of their business and sometimes get the impression that they are expecting me to tell them why.

I think that I might feel a little self-conscious about this b/c I have lost 3 clients since Christmas (termed one due to lots of issues, lost another due to mom's job hours switching, lost another due to potential nut allergy) so feel like maybe I need to offer reasons to justify their leaving. Maybe they feel a little self-conscious like they are on the chopping block next?

Is there a good phrase to convey to them that while I always look for long term clients, sometimes life happens and clients have to move on? I don't want them to think that I am hiding anything but I am trying to find the balance between satisfying a current client's trust in my care versus a prior client's right to privacy.

As well, do you address when new clients are starting? I have 2 new dcks starting in a few weeks and wondering if these same parents are going to question this, too? I was thinking of addressing this in our next newsletter, just that we were excited to be welcoming new friends.

[torontokids]

I have asked the parents that are leaving what they would like me to tell the other families if anything and go from there. I only terminated once and I was unsure what to tell the families but funny enough no one asked about him...I think they must of heard it all from their kids "bobby screamed all day."

[Fun&care]

I really think you should just tell them for two reasons:
1) they might worry they are next like you said or
2) they might think something is wrong with your daycare and start looking elsewhere.

I see nothing wrong with giving a quick explanation. Changing hours or a nut allergy are not big crazy secrets anyways. Just stick to the facts and don't say anything bad or start gossiping about the other families and you will be fine and I think the other families will appreciate your honesty.

[mickyc]

Just be honest. I have had a bit of a revolving door as of late too with one of my spots. My families always just seem shocked that they would leave because everyone else has been around for quite some time. People leave that is just the nature of our business. I have no problem letting my parents know someone has left. They usually help me try to fill the spots because they don't want me to end of closing my doors and going back to work.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I agree with the others, be honest without gossiping. I have 4-5 families at a time and they all know each other through dc and a few know each other outside of dc. I always talk to the kids during the last 2 weeks about how so and so is leaving and we take time to say goodbye to each other and have a little party on the child's last day.

Most of my children have left to go to preschool or a centre. A few have left because parents have lost jobs and I'm pretty sure one family left because they were just waiting until a friend of the family opened up her own daycare and were "using" me for the time being. Last summer I had 3 leave and I felt like that looked bad!! I was honest with the parent who was still here and with new parents as to why these spots were opening. I just had 1 leave the end of January and have one leaving tomorrow (preschool and parent lost job) and the mom who has been here the longest said "well, we aren't leaving anytime soon!" so that made me feel better lol.

I take it a bit personally when families leave (even though my head tells me not too and I do fully realize that many, many families will come and go over the years) but I feel like it it looks bad when it happens but I have never had anyone leave on bad terms so logically I know this is irrational.

If a child was leaving due to termination on my part or because the parents weren't happy with the care I provided, I would likely just say something like " xxx is leaving because it just wasn't the right fit here. We will miss xxx but are looking forward to our new friend"