Time to workout? if so, when?

[bright sparks]

Bright sparks, I think you are incredibly brave. To acknowledge what you are going through in such an honest way is truly the way for you to heal and better yourself.
You have just been through a major shock and your mind and body are now in recovery mode. You need to be kind and gentle with yourself right now and don't beat yourself up.
You are a good mom who wisely did not want your son to see you in full reaction to the trauma of having lost him for a few minutes.
I would suggest you slowly get back on course with your exercise and healthy eating regiment. Your reaction wanting to use food and alcohol to soothe yourself in normal. The fact that you didn't get take out and have devised another plan to curb your drinking is great. Have you ever thought of talking to someone professionally who can help you deal with your anxiety?
I have an anxiety as well. I can not drive on highways since my daughter was a toddler. Where I live the highways are horrible and I envision all kinds of horrible things happening when I am on the highway. I am a terrible passenger!
Praise yourself for not succumbing to downing that big bottle of wine and hitting the drive through.
Thank you for sharing

I am in treatment currently. I am involved in trauma therapy and boy have I ever come a long way. Sometimes things get worse before they get better though. As I have become more conscious of myself and everything that is jiggling around in my head, my anxiety has become a problem. Honestly, it's only been the last year or so that this has been a "generalized" anxiety whereas prior to that it was very rare and specific circumstances that I would feel a slight anxiety. I have major trust issues which stem from my past and although I understand it now, I'm still not able to overcome it. I am a work in progress. I purchased a book and cd about mindfulness a couple of weeks ago which I intend to start working through which deals with mindfulness in all areas of life from thought processes, eating habits etc etc and I am optimistic that this will help me.

I am so thankful to be able to speak freely on this forum. Most people deal with some form or mental health issue quietly and painfully in secret. It is still a major taboo subject and even I don't open up to many people about things although that is changing. Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement. I will be continuing to make healthy food choices and exercise which I know are an important part of my recovery.