Why do we feel guilty?

[mickyc]

I quit worrying about it. I am rarely take time off. I work when I am sick, never book appointments during daycare hours (haven't been to a dentist in a very long time!!), my doctor and eye doctor appointments are always after daycare hours. I would usually get my MIL to come watch the kids so I could go to my daughter's functions but this year I said forget it and I just gave notice and closed for 2 afternoons. I give my families tons of notice and I mean usually I give them my holiday schedule for the year at the beginning of January lol. I just gave my families one month's notice for my closing at 4 one day. That is very short notice for me lol.

[Secondtimearound]

I don't know I feel guilty too !! I've only taken one day off since September . That was to drive my son to a specialist in another city . The only dcf who had a problem ended up leaving the same month !! My contract says I have personal days and they wanted to deduct that day (even though I charge monthly , not daily ) it was a mess !!!
I have cut my days back so I'm now working only 3 days a week so I feel guilty if I think of taking a day off !!

[bright sparks]

Since September 2013 I dropped to M-Th and love having the Fridays to schedule all my appointments on. That being said, there are still the odd specialist appointments where I don't have the luxury of having a choice of days when maybe the dr doesn't have clinic hours that day. I do not feel guilty about taking time off anymore and I wonder if its just a matter of time and experience that changes this feeling. I used to care a lot about my families but now I don't. I have to look after myself because no one else will. I also had a rough financial year in 2013 because I was down two full timers and lost 2 more to kindergarten so I think I have got used to having less income so am not afraid to not take someone on or lose someone who doesn't respect me and my needs.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I think it's like any other job, it needs to be in moderation. If I were to close a day every month than I could understand a parent being frustrated but when it's an odd day here or there or some summer holidays than I feel it's no big deal. If a parent doesn't like that then they are free to find care elsewhere.

I am lucky that my fiance is my back up and works evenings so it's very very rare that I have to close for a whole day. It is really just my 3-4 weeks of holidays a year that parents have to find alternate care for.

[MonkeyPrincess]

Uh- your friend is not being understanding. Has she ever had a colonoscopy? I doubt it if you said she is 20 yrs you get than you. But even If she has, everyone's body is different, no one knows what will happen. I am glad you stood your ground.

[mattsmom]

I have a colonoscopy (sp?) booked the day before Good Friday. So, I told my friend, whose child I BABYSIT, not daycare because she's a substitute teacher and works only when she's called (making getting daycare difficult because she'd pay for days she won't use) that there will be THREE days I'm not taking her daughter (since I only charge for when I ACTUALLY look after her). Know what she says to me? "Oh, you'll be fine. The two days you're taking the clean-out meds." So I said to her, "Um, noooo... if I'm on the crapper every 30 minutes, she's into everything. What if she's strapped into her booster and I have NO time to take her out and have to RUN? She's unattended and has been pushing her feet against the table lately and tipping herself back." Know what she says? "It's not that bad. You'll be fine to take care of her." So I out and out said, "No. I am not taking her those two days OR the day of the procedure. Period. I cannot live with myself if she gets badly hurt even if you can." She looked at me and said, "Ok." Then I reiterated that there is 20 years between us (I'm pushing 50) and what doesn't happen to you, doesn't happen because your parts still work well whereas mine are beginning to shift and besides, we don't share the same body. How can you be SURE I'll not c&^p my pants uncontrollably? You don't.

I've had one and need to book another one soon (a lot of family history of colon cancer), and I took the day before and the day of the procedure off. It was on a Friday as well, so I had the weekend to relax.

I think this mother is being totally unreasonable, especially about something like this! Wow, I would have had some snarky remarks ready for her. You take the days you need and be done with it.