How to explain when a child leaves daycare

[MonkeyPrincess]

How do you explain to your dckids when one leaves? How about a parent? What do you say? Or would you just leave it as 'it didn't work out'.

[daycaremom9]

I have to address this very issue pretty soon. I was just going to tell the parents that I can't discuss it as it's a privacy issue. I'm not really sure what to tell the kids though.

[nschildcare]

My group is young (2-3 years), so I always let them know that so and so won't be here anymore to play with us but we will have a new friend starting. I take a lot of pictures throughout the day and have them hanging on the walls so the kids can still see all of our friends.

I don't tell parents when a child leaves. I am in the minority (on this board) but I feel it's a privacy issue, home daycare or not. I would not want other parents discussing my situation with a former provider, so that's where I am coming from. Only one parent ever asks.... but she is all about being in my business about everything When she asks, I just say, no, Johnny isn't here anymore to play with us, and leave it at that.

The only term I have ever had.... no one asked about him, lol.

[Wonderwiper]

I think it would be a bit weird not to mention it when someone leaves. Its none of anyone's business why, but I always tell parents when someone is leaving or when a new friend is joining us.

The kids don't really care why "Sally" isn't there anymore. A simple "Sally wont be coming to play anymore" is fine.

[5 Little Monkeys]

During the child's last couple weeks at daycare, I talk to the kids about how xxx is leaving and we won't see xxx anymore so we need to have lots of fun and play with xxx before they leave. My group has always been on the younger side (1-almost 3) so I don't know how much they really get it but I discuss it everyday to "prepare" them. I also talk to the child leaving about how much fun they are going to have at preschool/new daycare/ staying home with a parent etc so they also get used to it. On the last day we have a mini goodbye party and give hugs before everyone leaves.

As for parents, I don't think I've ever had a parent not ask! I only have 3-5 families in my care at one time so it's a close group and there have always been at least 2 that know each other outside of dc. Most of the time, the parent leaving will tell the others anyways. I have never had a parent leave on bad terms though so I have never thought that xxx leaving because they are going to preschool/new daycare/staying home with parent was overly private. If they were leaving because I termed them, I would just say "It didn't work out here so xxx is going to have fun at a new daycare".

For me, part of being a hdc is the "homey" feel I offer and that includes making the families feel comfortable and part of a group while here. All of my families get to know each other and the other children pretty good so it would be abrupt to come to dc one morning and little xxx wasn't here and no one had gotten the chance to say goodbye.

[CrazyEight]

I had to term a pair of siblings recently, and they stayed the full 2 weeks after I gave notice. What really irked me was that the mother TOLD the 3.5 year old that she wasn't going to be coming here anymore, before they found a new daycare, and while she was still coming for another week and a half. The girl didn't seem that bothered by it, thank god, but I was pretty taken aback when the child simply told me "mommy said I'm not coming here to play anymore." I just smiled and said that now she gets to go make even more new friends and play with new toys and kids, and moved on. She accepted it pretty well. Parents are harder. I'm just very professional about it with them. "Suzy was having some adjustment issues, so we've decided it wasn't the right fit here" and end it like that.