Thanks. I briefly mentioned last night about his behavior and how it's been escalating, but pretty constant over the time he's been here. So she comes this morning telling me that they'll use a timer when he doesn't want to follow a command or count to 5. Also that she will give him a word to describe what he's feeling when he doesn't listen (because I'm supposed to say "you are feeling defiant, aren't you?"??).

I understand basic behavioral techniques, lady, thanks. But there comes a point (and it's before 4 years old) when a child should be able to listen and follow most basic commands, without having to be convinced or talked into it. He actually ends up taking the bulk of my attention at meals and craft time. And he's the second oldest.