I think you are asking if you should let them eat the fruits and veggies before the main lunch item...I would sya yes! I would rather have them eating the fruits and veggies than probably anything else since it is probably the only time in the day that they get fruits or veggies by the sounds of it. Can you serve the fruits and veggies for morning snack and then main lunch item at lunch? I feel so sad when I hear of kids eating like this...it truly is setting them up for countless health problems But, you are fighting an uphill battle as the parents are obviously not on board with healthy eating.