Support please

[cfred]

Lee Bee...first, let me say how sorry I am you're going through this. Separation is awful. I'm divorced now for 13 years. I hope your plans of holding your family together will work out for you and I remember trying so hard to do the same thing. Should it not pan out, let me tell you that everything will be fine. It's scary as hell at first, but once you have your track, no matter which way it goes, you'll get focus and come out alright on the other end. Please, as one nurturer to another, please don't bend yourself into a pretzel to appease your husband to make it work. It's a joint effort. If you don't see your efforts being reciprocated, pay attention to that.

And...now to be a complete killjoy....but I'm concerned about the fact that you're leaving the family home. Is your child going to remain living at the marital home? Please reconsider this idea. I was advised very strongly by my attorney that this was a very bad idea and could jeopardize my ability to retain custody of my children, should things go south....which despite my best efforts, they did. Please don't be offended and I understand what you're trying to do in the best interests of your marriage. However, the fact that he's asked for a separation, to me, says that you may need to consider your own best interests as well, just in case you're not both on the same page through this whole journey.