Children aren't as inept as many like to make them out to be. While candles can be dangerous they can also be perfectly safe when used properly. I used to work in a Waldorf daycare and part of our meal process was to light a candle and at the end of the meal the children took turns snuffing it out with the candle snuffer (the lighting and snuffing was to song that started and ended our meals). Not sure if the toddler program did this but we definitely did it with the 4yrs and up groups. The children learned that a candle was something to monitor and be mindful of.