Turning away a parent

[FS2011]

What's the best way to decline a families registration? After you have had an interview and feel it's not a good fit.

[Play and Learn]

Usually at an end of every interview, I tell my parents to continue shopping around because there's a certain daycare out there for you if we don't fit.

Or lie and tell them that you have found someone to fill that space!

Good luck!

[playfelt]

If it is something major that comes up at the interview then I tell them right up that unless there are certain changes there is no way I can take the child. This is usually for a one year old where the family really should have a nanny mom can control rather than a daycare group. Enough comes out at the interview that the family isn't very likely to choose me because obviously we are not a good fit. If they do call back and want my space I will decide. It might be that they have said you know you were among the first we interviewed and now we realize that whatever is what daycare providers expect and ok we are willing to go along with it and we liked your daycare. Then I may agree to work with them (without removing all my daycare ads just in case). I will reiterate what my concerns are and get at least a verbal approval from them to agree to the terms.

I wonder sometimes where does our allegiance to the wants of the parents stop and our responsibility shift to the child and allowing them to mature such as when to take away bottles, soothers, expect them to use words instead of screams, take off own shoes, letting girls play with trucks or boys with dolls if parents have expressed concerns. Even if parents don't see the need to let the child learn these things do we do the child a service or disservice by expecting them to behave within certain age appropriate expectations.

Mostly I start out with the parents expectations and then move on to my own just "assuming" the parent is also progressing the child at home too even if I know it isn't true. Amazing how many kids have bottles and soothers at home but use a sippy cup and no soother at daycare as an example.

[Sunflower]

depending on how comfortable I am with the parent, I may be honest and tell them why I don;t think it would be a good fit. If it is a more delicate situation ( the woman's husband made me really uncomfortable etc) I would say the spot was taken.

[giraffe]

I usually just tell them that I can not meet their needs.

[Emilys4Guppies]

I had this happen recently with a family who didn't tell me their full scheduling needs prior to our home visit. I phoned them that evening to tell them I couldn't take them. I wrote out what I wanted to say prior to the call, so that I wouldn't be caught off guard or babble. "You have a beautiful family, unfortunately after discussing with my husband, we've decided that the hours just aren't going to work for our family. Thank you for your interest and we wish you all the best." All she could say was, 'ok thank you'.

[Judy Trickett]

I let them go out the door and hope they just don't call back. But, if they Do call back I tell them straight up I think we are on different pages and it is best to just not get started and then I refer them elsewhere.

[BCParent]

I always tell any family coming to interview me that it's a two way process, they may be interviewing me but I, in turn, am interviewing them to ensure that's it a good fit both ways and with the current children and families I provide for. It usually catches them by surprise because they never think that they are anything but the interviewer in the process and that they hold the whole process in their hands but I'm not a slave and I need to have things 'click' in my daycare. It works for me and I have no problem telling a family it's not a good fit for me.

[Isawitfirst]

If I have a bad feeling about the interview I tell them I have several other families to interview this week and will be in touch the following week.

[sunnydays]

I always tell them that I am looking for the best fit for my daycare too. This makes them realize that they do not have the upperhand and then they usually start trying to sell me on their child Also, it lets them know that I care about the kids enough to look for a child who will fit in well with the group. Then they usually call or email back asking if THEY passed the interview and would I take their child