Quote Originally Posted by Fun&care View Post
"Let's hope this phase passes soon." That is your red flag right there that she isn't admitting there is an actual PROBLEM here she just thinks she can wait it out. It doesn't sound like she is planning on doing anything at all....

Waiting around hoping that today will be better doesn't sound like a healthy option either bright. I don't know, but if it were me I would start thinking of an exit plan for this family...
I think after investing so much into this child, just because its hard now doesn't really warrant giving up. He would benefit from two caregivers working together not being shuttled off to someone else when the going gets tough. He isn't intentionally setting out to hurt the other kids so it's not like that is his goal and I'm fighting to correct that behaviour. Yes obviously a red flag, which I acknowledged, when mom said she hopes it just passes. So what I ask you then, is what exactly do I say to this parent to get her on board with doing something beyond wishing it will get better? Any suggestions? She is at a loss and I'm not entirely sure what direct advice to give her beyond what I've already said. Something that just popped into my head was how so many people say "we don't have the right to tell a parent how to parent their child" which I tend not to agree with for the most part for these situations precisely. I do have the right to request and advise you that you should try x, y and z if your child's actions are effecting the wellbeing of others. So I'd love some advice on what folks think I should say because I am not about to throw the towel in on a rare 3 yr old spot for starters, a child I've had for nearly 3 years and a family I've dealt with for over 5. I think it would be much better to try and get through to her than looking for an exit plan. At least being friends with her means we can have a bit more of a frank conversation, that being said though, if she says she is trying her best, who is anyone to call her a liar? I ask her what she does in these situations but she basically lets them do what they like as long as they are happy and rough housing in her house is acceptable whereas in my daycare setting it is not. He is getting mixed signals from left right and centre. This child needs consistency not someone else to adapt to. I also need to figure out how to make this work, because financially I can't lose that much money so I'm not looking to terminate just yet.