I Know It's Coming....Request to Stop Napping!

[FSD]

Hi Ladies,

I have a dcp who, I believe, will be soon requesting that I drop nap for her 2 1/2 year old. She is constantly making these comments during drop off how he was up until almost 10pm last night before he finally fell asleep, and asking me how long he napped for, etc. I know she's thinking that by dropping the nap, her bedtime woes will go away. We, of course, know better! My question to you all is, what do I say to her when she does ask about dropping his nap? I just want to be prepared as I'm sure it's coming!

TIA!

[Other Mummy]

Simply say....that's too bad you want to drop 'special snowflake's' nap. I don't offer a no-nap service.

Then hand her a bunch of information that you preprinted off the internet supporting why children this young need their naps.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I do agree that naps are important for children when they are 3 and under ( well technically I think they're important for everyone, adults included, but unfortunately that doesn't work! Lol) However, I do think some kids outgrow naps a lot quicker than others.

I have compromised and put in my contract that all children must nap/lay quietly for 30-60 minutes. If they are awake after 30 mins I will get them up and they can watch tv, do puzzles or read books in the upstairs living room with me. If they are sleeping after 30 minutes than I will wake them after an hour as they obviously need it IMO. I've only had one who did this and she almost always fell asleep. She was 3.5. A mom of a 2 year old tried this for a couple weeks but than her bedtime went back to normal and so did naps. Just a phase the child went through.

I don't know what I think about naps/bedtime ....I do think they sort of go hand in hand but I also know a few kids who nap late, 2-4/3-5pm and they still go to bed between 8-9. I don't think an early afternoon nap (1-3pm) should be affecting a child until 10pm but who knows?? Every child is different I guess.

You need to decide how important naptime is to you and decide how long you'd like nap to be and stand your ground with the parents. For me, an hour child free is good and honestly, the last hour with the child playing quietly has never stopped me from doing my cleaning, art prep, browsing online etc.

[Fun&care]

I am odd man out on this one. I found at this age my own kids also took a long time to fall asleep at night and it was found that by reducing their nap or cutting it out entirely the nighttime sleep troubles went away. This is what I offer: for kids who are aged 3 and up they still have to lie down on their cot for one full hour (all the way until they go to school non negotiable). After the hour is up they are allowed to watch TV and sit quietly. I do not offer activities during naptime-just TV and the kids are expected to sit quietly so the rest of the gang can sleep undisturbed. I don't drop naps for kids under age 3 however as I often don't feel that a) it's appropriate at that age and b) they are not mature enough and typically need more attention/discipline from me which takes away from my break.

Does it suck- yes because I am sorta giving up my break. But I also know how much it sucks when your child is up late because they are napping too much so I do feel for parents which is why I do what I do!

Forgot to add - I do wake them up after the hour whether they are sleeping or not.

[mickyc]

My own daughter cut out her afternoon naps early on too. She was never a child who needed a lot of sleep. There unfortunately are some kids who don't need that much sleep. In my contract all kids under 4 are required to lay down for an hour after that they can get up and watch tv (and be quiet!!). If they are sleeping when I go in after an hour then I leave them and parents know that.

[FSD]

Thanks everyone! All my kids, with the exception of an almost 4 year old, are sleeping within 30 mins of putting them down, and none give me any problems whatsoever. The oldest one is allowed to get some toys of her choosing and she lays quietly on her bed. Sometimes she falls asleep, sometimes not, but she is to remain in there until I come and get her. Apparently this little one who is staying up until 10pm sometimes, didn't nap all weekend, and he was a wreck on Monday for me! I'm pretty sure he still needs a nap, he's just resisting bed time as my own children did at that age. My quiet time is VERY important to me, so I'm not willing to give it up to watch him until the others are up. He's not one to sit and watch TV quietly either. He also shares a room with another and I don't want to risk waking her up if I'm getting him early. I've had some issues already with these parents (they're the ones that showed up one Monday morning and he was in underwear, without any warning!). I'm just going to stick to my guns and let them know that nap/quiet time is mandatory here.

[Crayola kiddies]

Try quoting the DNA saying the requirement is 60 mins of rest time then the child will be offered books to look at for the remainder of quiet time

[flowerchild]

I'd be concerned about a child that age becoming over-tired and then a few weeks down the road you (and the parents) will be dealing with some big-time behaviour concerns. If you don't already have a nap-time policy, it might be time to add one. Especially since a 2.5 year old who doesn't nap would need to be supervised more than a 3.5 year old who doesn't nap thereby eradicating your break all together.

I adjusted my contract to say that all children under the age of three must have an afternoon nap and that after the age of three the need for napping will be assessed on an individual basis. It also says that children who don't nap will be given quiet time on the couch with books for at minimum an hour or an age appropriate movie and that a child who is tired enough to sleep will be allowed to sleep. (ie. I'm not going to force them to stay awake all afternoon and deal with a miserable child) I also added a reminder that often children who don't need a nap at home may still need one at daycare because of the stimulation and activity.

[mattsmom]

I have it in my contract that all children need to have a quiet time in the afternoon, if they are under 3 it's nap and if they are older and not in school they still need to sit or lay quietly watching a movie during quiet time. I will not give up that time in the afternoon that I use to wind down, have my own lunch, clean up, answer emails, etc...

[FSD]

Yes...I agree with you both above. And the thing is, he naps! So I'd have to keep him awake and deal with a grumpy kid. Um...no thank you! I can see it by lunch time he's sucking his thumb, and I know that's his sign that he's getting sleepy.